Finally Decided To Have This Done

[Hellion]

Have decide to get Electro-shock Therapy done aka: electro-convulsive therapy.

this is basically the only way to stop the war in my head,stopping the hate,stopping the

negative thoughts and forgetting what a POS I used to be,all I want is to go back to

what it was like to actually wake up and not have to throw up

or dread work or thinking of ways to destroy myself,like anyone on this planet gives a sh$ anyway(being sarcastic)

and the unfortunate urges to go back to cocaine,are another reason.

But I will still hate gas prices and political BS.

this will be taking a big chance and hopefully it will erase everything that had to do with said above

I am somewhat familiar with this procedure and have heard more positive results that bad.

fuck pills,they never worked and have interfeared with work.there is no cure in a pill and never will be.

THC is one thing that does work,unfortunately illegal.this video made me decide.

as long as this does not affect my ability to be able to do my current line of work.

and yes the hate,negative shit has wore out its welcome.

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[Onyx]

I'm glad you have done research but this procedure worries me. Have you really tried everything else that you can?

If you do go through with it, I wish you the very best results. (((hugs)))

[Scales]

I've struggled with trying to find a viable solution to all the negativity, anxiety, depression, breakdowns I deal with. So I can relate.

I agree about pills, I've had friends they've helped, but I can't go through with them at all. I don't believe in split personalities, but one of the things I've noticed is that people who use any drug develop a change to personality/mask, especially when on a frequent basis; really it kind of looks like anti-depressants are just doing the same but with the risky possibility of a better personality on top of the natural mind having unresolved issues. To me anti-depressants are all unpredictable drugs, they've done good and bad for people I know, but if they made things worse for me, I'd be screwed.

I'm not a huge fan of weed, but I agree that it could work for depression, it already has as a painkiller. Weed isn't anywhere as harmful as tobacco; the fact it's not legalized and over-hyped as something sinister and dangerous in the US is pointless. But a lot of things in this country, and around the world, are pointless at present.

I don't have much room to judge because the negativity I deal with has not permanently gone away, but the whole thing definitely seems risky. Whatever you decide, good luck man, I wish you the best.

[bean]

In order to have electroshock therapy, you first have to be evaluated by a psychiatrist.

That form of therapy is generally used as a last resort when medication and/or therapy doesn't work. Different medications have to be tried, as each person is different and will respond differently to medications. The person has to actually work at therapy - granted therapy doesn't work for some people who work at it, but it won't work at all for people who don't give an honest attempt at it.

I didn't look at the youtube thing, but here is more information on electroshock therapy:

Electroconvulsive Therapy

Good luck. It's good that you want to make changes in your life.

[the eternal]

We all care about you (ok, most of us care about you--the others can go to hell)

I would recommend cutting out drugs (if you're still taking any) and alcohol, so you can clear your mind

and focus on yourself.

And try to find a good therapist who understands you, and can help you work through your problems, so you can:

understand why you feel this way, and

REALLY get to the bottom of things so you can overcome.

I feel like you're asking for a quick fix to a complex problem

(Feel free to look at the computer and tell me to go f&^% myself)

Youtube is fun and can often be informational but, as I think Onyx was hinting at it,

it does not quite have the heft of medical journals and trained licensed professionals.

There may be a drug you haven't tried yet, or a method you haven't explored through your previous therapy sessions.

Don't give up.

If you exhaust all other possibilities, your therapist will come to the same conclusion you have.

It's great that you want so much to help yourself.

You're halfway there.

Before you do something drastic though, make sure you've exhausted everything else.

AND STAY AWAY FROM THE COKE!

[Ash_Sangre]

Dear Crank:)

I know how you feel, to a certain point, everyones life is different. I struggle with depression and anxiety everyday. I have been seeing shrinks since i could talk, and they really didnt do any good. I found it better to release my inner problems with writing, drawing painting, singing, hell anything i could do to take my mind off of things. I still do get dreadful sometimes, but it helps to talk to others who go through the same thing. Personally, I had a bf who went through EST and he had heart problems afterward. I worry about you:) If you ever want to talk or hang out, you know how to get ahold of me.

Love u dearie

Ash

[Homicidalheathen]

$$ ex had this done and she has bad things to say about it.

Maybe you should ask her sometime....before you decide for sure, talk to the patients....not some doc who gets money and attention from doing it...

[jadnifer]

You know how I feel about it already, man!

If you decide to go through with it , my best wishes for you

[Steven]

Laura's dad had it - in Eloise.

he was/is still a tortured soul.

her nephew also was going to have it (not sure if he did) - and hes still a huge prick who will one day make the news for climbing up on the clocktower and picking people off with a rifle on a lovely sunday afternoon.

personally I think our demons hunt us till we contend with them. Good luck to you Crank - your a good guy.

[Kit Kat P]

Either way, good luck.