A Hypothetical Conversation

[FarrIL]

I wrote this last night. I was remembering "A Goth Mother's Story" while I wrote it.... I dont know how long it took me, but I posted it on my LJ and Spook liked it, told me to make a video and post it on youtube. I'm still considering it, but here it is.

Also, I didnt know where to post this, move it accordingly if it doesnt fit.

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Person 1: "You know, it's freaks like you that make this world so unacceptable."

Person 2: "Do you really believe that? With the statement that you just made, beginning with 'freaks like you', you really believe that?"

Person 1: "Well yeah, I mean look at you. Aiming to be rebellious, making people stare, offending them, scaring them...."

Person 2: "You never heard the phrase 'Those that mind, dont matter'. Have you ever, even for one day, desired to be different? Or to be comfortable with yourself?"

Person 1: "I am quite comfortable with myself."

Person 2: "Then why blame somebody else for an unacceptable world? A freak like me, as you so put, is this way because it's who they are. I am comfortable, being this way. You and I are no different than each other.... we both have families, both have jobs, both have our hobbies, and both have our vices. The biggest difference is what's on the outside."

Person 1: "Why do you dress that way?"

Person 2: "I am comfortable in my own skin. It's taken me a very long time to be in this state of contentment with who I am as a person, outside and in. What, pray tell, makes me a bad person, because of how comfortable I feel with myself."

Person 1: "But no good person would ever dress that way."

Person 2: "Look on the news. Watch it and pay attention, very carefully, to what they say. What crimes are being committed? Murder, theft, abuse, kidnapping. Even escort services. These people being reported, what are they dressed like? Some are college students, shopping at 'normal' stores. Others are cops, teachers and other authority figures, committing sex crimes, killing people against their duties, hitting those who cannot fight back. To be blunt, open your eyes and tell me you see a Goth on the television, committing a horrendous crime. You hear of school shootings, where the culprit is wearing a black trench coat, but what makes him qualify as a Goth? He could have been wearing denim and a t-shirt underneath that jacket. But did the investigators bother to look? I doubt it. They chose to not dig deeper. You blame us for making this world unacceptable. You blame us, but who is really to blame for jumping to conclusions when there is so much more of a story to tell. However, the story falls on deaf ears, it seems."

Person 1: "So, you're blaming me for making this world unacceptable?"

Person 2: "I never said that. What I said was opinions like that are what make us look bad, and what makes this world all the worse. You'll find that people from this 'Alternative Lifestyle' are among the most sane and caring people, accepting of the world around us, admitting that it sucks, but we're not committing the crimes that apparent 'normal' people are. You dont see people being dragged away in straight jackets, wearing spikes and black lipstick. You see clean-cut men and women, who snapped from years of one problem or another, being escorted into police cars, being put behind bars. Are us Goths still guilty of crimes we never committed?"

Person 1: "But those youths that try to emulate the look..."

Person 2: "Are children not allowed to take the journey to discovering themselves?"

Person 1: "What do you mean?"

Person 2: "Children, no matter what age they're at, are growing, exploring, learning and gaining new wisdom from the world around them. The sights, the sounds, the opinions.... in some way, it affects them. But it is really up to the child as to what they become in the end. We were there ourselves, you and I. The both of us were traveling down our own paths, discovering new things, experimenting, trying something new. Who are you, or I, to say that these children will remain the rebellious youths you speak of? They are growing, though they may not act like it. They are learning, they are trying new things, trying to figure out who they are, where they stand, and what to do about it. You and I are no different than they, as we ourselves have been there. We just ended up in different places.... and that is no crime."

Person 1: "Explain the graffiti, the vandalism, the torn jeans and shirt, the wild hair... what do they mean?"

Person 2: "We as people search to become accepted by someone, be it a friend, a lover, maybe even a family member. We search for a group to belong to, like a murder of crows, or a pod of whales. Our kin runs deeper than family blood, as we find those who truly understand us. Gang members are held together by the same beliefs, and while some arent committing gang rapes, the bad gangs take the spotlight and remove the attention away from those are feel as though they are trying to help. People look to belong, in some way. Graffiti is just a gang's way of marking their territory, though some artists see graffiti as a creative outlook. You would probably have to ask the actual person, doing the vandalism, as to what their purpose is for doing such. The torn clothing and the dyed hair are ways for the person to find their personal aesthetics. Their comfort zone. What looks good and what doesnt. The fashion, or in your opinion - a lack thereof, is associated with the lifestyle. The lace and corsets may be associated with the Romantic Goth, while the torn jeans and fishnets might associate with the loud and opinionated Punks. To each their own, and really, if you sat down and talked with these people, you'd learn that as different as we are, we have a lot to say. Just like you."

Person 1: "But what would prompt someone to talk to someone like you about that?"

Person 2: "Ask yourself that, as you approached me on this topic. Are we not discussing the very answers to your question?"

Person 1: "..... Why did I approach you? Oh yeah, it's because you are someone I consider Goth. And I dread my kids becoming someone like you, and why you are the way you are despite the negative opinions on the matter."

Person 2: "The negative opinions are just that. Opinions. Sometimes any person needs to take them with a grain of salt. With a Goth or Punk, or anyone outside the 'norm', we need to make sure we are strong enough to be called horrible things, being thought of as a bad person. We need to prepare ourselves, by being comfortable with ourselves, to deal with the negative attention we get. And through it all, we still remain who we are on the inside, and the outside. We make statements through our outsides, and elaborate it through our insides. To change because someone calls us a whore, or vandal, or druggie... it shows we are, as a person, weak. Getting back to 'those who mind, dont matter'. We learn to take the bad with the good, we learn to filter out the negatives and remember the positives. However, we also do try to see things from others perspectives."

Person 1: "But how?"

Person 2: "We imagine what we would do in a situation like this. To show fear is to stare, and make crass comments, and insult. To show bravery and curiosity... as well as a willingness to learn, we ask questions. We, as people, have a desire to know things, to learn, as a part of our growth. How would we treat our children? How would we react if they got into a fight? What would we make for dinner? Celebrate a birthday? Decorate a room or go shopping for necessities. Really, the thoughts are probably similar. Though our tastes are different, we are still people with children and jobs, and we probably react the same in many situations. But if I see a fellow Goth or Punk, I approach them and compliment them, or give a greeting. You do the same with yours. How would we feel if we saw one of our kids bring home their first boyfriend or girlfriend? I'm sure that, like you, we would say 'treat them nicely, or face the wrath of the parental units'.... though in a slightly different way. We care for our kids as much as you do, and if they got involved into anything negative like a gang or drugs, we, as caring parents, would do what we could to cease the activity. Do you understand? Really, the outcome of the learning experience is all in how you handle the cause.... do you stare and curse, or do you ask? You chose to ask, which I commend you for your lack of cowardice."

Person 1: "Well.... thank you. I really didnt see it that way."

Person 2: "To be honest, you tried to start with an accusation but it turned into a conversation. I dont expect you to keep the same opinion about all of us, because yes, there are some ignorant Goths and Punks, but do keep in mind that when you meet one that actually shows their intelligence, remember that not all of us are bad. Nor are we much different than yourself."

[jadnifer]

Very well written!!

I very much enjoyed reading this and there is much truth in what you wrote!

[FarrIL]

Very well written!!

I very much enjoyed reading this and there is much truth in what you wrote!

Thank you. =3

[the eternal]

So refreshing to see a DGNer that can write coherently and clearly.

Very reasoned, without being boring.

I liked it.

[FarrIL]

So refreshing to see a DGNer that can write coherently and clearly.

Very reasoned, without being boring.

I liked it.

Thankie!! =3

[Scales]

I enjoyed reading it.

[Para Bellum]

A good read. I wish real life went like that more often...

[Kit Kat P]

A good read. I wish real life went like that more often...

Quoted for truth.

[Para Bellum]

Oh, I've got a story from active duty about acceptance. Might start a different thread on that later.