I'm Not Back, Really

[Fierce Critter]

...but hey, bandwagons are fun!!!

I didn't leave. But my activity here has ramped down for several reasons.

1) I've been off-meds for over 3 months. My depression has dropped back on me like a ton of Mr. Creosotes. (not really obscure Monty Python reference). I'm not spending all day on DGN like I did back in NC. But now I'm spending all my time on Second Life, living vicariously through my virtual character. It's not so bad - how else can one go through their day in head-to-toe latex and 8" stilhetto heels with very little real $$ and no fear of falling off your shoes?

2) I've got this "woman problem" thing happening now that is more than likely causing anemia. My energy level is nil. I get up, feed cats, go to the library, stuff like that. But after about 2-4 hours of that, I'm exhausted again.

3) I basically flipped out on Saturday and upon advice from my counselor, ended up at Wyandotte Hospital. A psychologist evaluated me, but after sitting in an exam room in the ER from 9:45 p.m. Saturday to 5:45 a.m. Sunday, I had myself together, was able to talk rationally to her, and convinced her to let me go home so I could sleep in my cozy, cathair covered bed. She was hesitant, I think she wanted me to stay and get some assisted rest. But I assured her that as soon as our insurance kicks in, my ass is going to a gloriously welcome Psychiatrist for counseling & proper medication. As well as an MD and OBGYN for check-ups and all that stuff I'm actually looking forward to.

4) To top things off, during my Saturday nutfest, I stumbled off a step in front of the church down the street and fucked my left ankle up. I refused x-rays (insurance doesn't kick in until March 1st) as the doctor's initial exam said "severe sprain" and this is pretty identical to an injury I got back in high school playing volleyball. Folks - the side of the ankle is NOT meant to be walked on. But I can't walk on it without intense pain, so I'm pretty much homebound, getting from bedroom to bathroom by kneeling on a desk chair on wheels and Speed Racer-ing myself back and forth. I've got crutches but my upper body strength never was good even prior to depression, and at this point stick-walking my fat ass for more than about 10 feet gets me exhausted & kills my good leg. So I'm not trying to go far with them.

Jon went back to his previous job last week. He got a raise, they lowered the cost of our health insurance, and he's happier now that he's not expected to be a certified electrician. Our insurance starts up again on the 1st of March, so most of this will be taken care of pretty quick. For now, it's wait-wait-wait, and deal.

Oh, and tomorrow is my birthday. And I'm turning FUCKING 40. I need to get back out to CC again so all my DGN friends can look at me, hear my age, and say, "NO WAAAAYY!!! I thought you were, like, Hillary Duff's age!!!" Damn, I miss those ego-boosts baaaaad.

Oh, and to those of you who are saying, "wow, she's just asking for attention," well, duh. Anyone who posts on a message board is expecting to get attention. Just saying, "Hi! My name is EvilDarknessEmbracer, you guys seem cool!" is asking for attention. So there.

Luv ya's! :D

[nilhil_glory]

happy birfday ahead of time? =)

[bean]

Happy pre-bday..sorry things are not so good at the moment, but at least they look like they will be getting better!

[Steven]

Girl, next time your feeling like flippin out just call me and I'll take you to Ci Ci's pizza.

Steven and Ci Ci's.....why that shits good medicine.

xoxox

Steven

PS - women get more beautiful when they age as gracefully as you do.

Men, our hair falls out.

and Im halfway to 42 and still pretty.

[Rayne]

Happy early Birthday!!!

[freydis]

Feel better.

and....

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

So, I ahve a day to get my spanking arm warmed up? Wow... your butt is going to be sore.

[Fierce Critter]

So, I ahve a day to get my spanking arm warmed up? Wow... your butt is going to be sore.

My ass is already sore.

Those desk-chair trips to the bathroom are so much work, I refuse to do it just to answer nature's call. So I stop at the kitchen and kneel at the sink and wash a few dishes on the way back.

Try it sometime. Kneel on a chair at the sink while you wash dishes. The ass workout is amazing.

I'm not gaining any upper body strength this way. But I'll be able to crack walnuts with my asscheeks by the time my ankle heels. Good thing I hate walnuts.

[Brenda Starrr]

I'm glad that you're doing better, Happy Birthday in advance, and I wanna crack walnuts with my ass.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

I am so turned on right now...

Women in the kitchen doing dishes...and cracking walnuts with her ass...

[jadnifer]

I'm sorry that things aren't going the way that you want them too right now, but look on the bright side. Things WILL get better.

Happy Birthday in advance!

[Msterbeau]

I'm not quite sure how I should feel about all this... so I'll just say I love you and happy birthday. Geezer.

[creatureofthenyte]

I laughed my ass off when I saw the headline of this thread. Sorry to hear that your depression is back.

I've seen pics of you on here, you're gonna be 40 eh? Happy birthday, I think it's gonna look good on you.

[Guest Megalicious]

First off welcome back my dearest C!!! I have missed out talks. =(

Second happy early b-day, even if your bday is about to start in 15 mins.

Third;

WTF STEVEN!!! WHERE IS MY CI CI'S !!!!!

[the eternal]

happy Birthday, and know we're all behind you.

Apparently Gaf and Steven are behind you with a whip

Take care now

[diana2di]

sorry to hear about the breakdown.. but a few more days till insurance kicks in.. happy birthday and i know the feeling of havign the depression kick in.

[DeadBurgerKing (10)]

I love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!