20 Worst Places To Wake Up On Saturday Morning

[jynxxxedangel]

The 20 Worst Places To Wake Up On Saturday Morning:

* Your parents’ driveway with the car still running.

* The bushes outside your ex-girlfriend’s apartment using a boom box as a pillow.

* Spooning some random dude.

* In a bath tub covered in blood.

* The Emergency Room with: A) a stab wound, B) significantly less teeth, C) your arms handcuffed to the bed, and/or D) your mom hysterically crying across the room.

* The back seat of a stranger’s car.

* In a strip club getting asked if that last lap dance should go on your credit card like the others.

* On a downtown park bench in a city you’re unfamiliar with.

* Next to your buddy wailing on a chick who may or may not be a professional.

* Surrounded by your friends trying to figure out how you’re too stupid to find a bathroom.

* The back bedroom of a trailer, for the second time.

* Your parents’ kitchen floor.

* Next to a minor telling you it’s “our little secret”.

* The front lawn of the local synagogue.

* Cleveland.

* Next to any chick your friends have nicknamed slam pig, war pig, big bear, polar bear, hedgehog, freight elevator, or anything else that references her size and/or resemblance to a wild animal.

* The drunk tank with someone dropping a deuce in the community toilet.

* The couch with no pants on and the dryer running.

* The neighbors’ front porch when you don’t know the neighbors.

* On the floor of your old apartment with the new residents dialing 911.

Where are some of the worst places YOU have woken up? Many of mine are already listed here!

[candyman]

Mexico

New Orleans...too bad it wasn't completely destoryed

[Head Wreck]

Southampton naval docks atop a container. and i only went out for a quiet pint with an old friend.

some random shrubbery opposite the zone (think CC but twice as filthy)

locked inside a room of a strange house i vaguely remember crawling through an upstairs window.

[TomCat]

i woke up with the Vatican as my last phone call once...7 minutes to the Vatican...I think the Pope left me on hold til I passed out.

[hunhee]

hehe it's worse when you go out on a friday and don't come to until sunday..

[Simon Bar Sinister]

work.

[jynxxxedangel]

hehe it's worse when you go out on a friday and don't come to until sunday..

Especially when you return wearing the same clothes and makeup you left in. Yup--been there! I call those my Courtney Love weekends! I leave looking like a million bucks, and return disguised as a homeless hooker. There's nothing quite like showing up on the back of a motorcycle at ten in the morning on Sunday, and falling up your porch in a wrinkly evening dress, with Alice Cooper eyes, and reeking of Pabst Blue Ribbon and whisky-- while all the neighbours are out doing yardwork!

[bean]

My front porch.

In my car (not running) parked partially on the lawn and partially on the driveway.

[Brenda Starrr]

Next to ANY of my exes.

[StormKnight (1)]

Handcuffed to a water tower in your underwear.

Between your boss and their spouse.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

Jan 1, bare naked, back seat of a car (no idea who's it was), 70 miles from where I started drinking.

[Destroit]

I say this through the experience of a few friends: on the sidewalk in the ghettoest ghetto of Detroit (pick one, there's a few).

[Nightgaunt]

In a subway station in Camden, NJ in a puddle of congealed vomit.

Not one of my finer moments.

[jynxxxedangel]

One time, I passed out/took a nap in my whirlpool tub, and woke up while in the process of drowning..

[taysteewonderbunny]

Naked, on the cement floor of a drag queen's apartment in New Orleans, January 2, broken stem of a wine glass still tightly entwined in my fingers. WTF?

[pomba gira]

At the bottom of the stairs with a package of frozen chicken wings clutched in my hand

Standing in my parents' kitchen, naked, holding my nightie, with a carving knife on the counter in front of me

...don't remember if either was actually a Saturday morning, all I know is I'm devoutly thankful those days are safely in the past.

[jynxxxedangel]

Perhaps I should change the name of this thread to,

"How To Sleep Like A RAWKSTARRR!"

..it seems much more befitting of us all.

[Der Nister]

* The couch with no pants on.

I've done that only add that I had a blanket on top of me. Last thing I remember was sitting on that couch at 3 a.m. watching t.v. with a group of friends.

No one said anything about what happened.

Also woke up in a firends bed (female friend) and my pants were off and she was sleeping next to me wearing almost nothing.

Still not sure if anything happened. *lmao!*

We were still friends after that for many years so........