Perceptual Reality

[nodrew]

I was speaking on the phone a little earlier about a phrase/philosophy that I've always held, but haven't used in quite awhile. As no one has posted to this forum yet, I thought I'd share.

Non-person:

As an extreme to the idea of perceptual reality, I've always held the belief that there are two types of people in the world, persons and non-persons. By my definition, a person is someone whom I hold some sort of feelings for, in either a positive or a negative way. They are someone who has some sort of impact on my existance. Someone I like, I will be sad if they are gone and happy if they are around. The opposite is true for someone whom I dislike.

A non-person however is the exact opposite of both. They are the drama-bunnies who I know, but don't know. The ones who don't have any sort of impact on my life, in any way shape or form, other than to obstruct my sense of vision, hearing and/or smell. These people I tend to forget about rather quickly. I may know their names and I may act pleasantly towards them, but in the end, their lives are their own and have nothing to do with mine. As reality is individual and defined by our own perception of experiences, these people really don't exist in any real way.

I know it sounds rather awful and to many of you, I am a non-person, but this is how I make sense of the world. This is my explaination, in the most blunt of terms, to how I relate to the average person I meet and/or see.

Does anyone else feel similarly? any holes in this logic? (I'm sure there are dozens ) Anyone else have an example of how they see perceptual reality? Any other similar explainations?

[Jarodaka]

Aww, man, can't we just enjoy the new board for awhile before talking about multiple realities?

[Onyx]

I should know better than to dive into the philosophy forum before I've had caffeine. I don't consider anyone a non-person unless they've done something to permanently piss me off. Then I do find the best revenge is living well, and ignoring them.

drama-bunnies

That's a unique phrase Reminds me of the Donnie Darko flim for some reason.

*sigh* Not enough sleep last night. Neeeeed caffeeeeiiine!

[nodrew]

See, that's where our philosophies differ, a non-person to me is someone who is exactly neutral in my mind. Someone whom if they walk away, I will not miss. Not because I dislike them, but simply because they do not matter to me at all. Someone who has wronged me is a person because my mind is forced to deal with whatever they have done to wrong me, thus they have affected my life in a negative way. They are persons.

"Drama bunnines" aka, 3/4 of City Club.

[Nienna]

I'm with you on this Drew. It's like you read my mind!

[nodrew]

I'm with you on this Drew.  It's like you read my mind!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hope I'm not being to invasive.

[Nienna]

Hope I'm not being to invasive.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

nah... you're *almost* a person in my book... hsow up at CC more often and you could make the leap!!

[Fierce Critter]

a non-person to me is someone who is exactly neutral in my mind. Someone whom if they walk away, I will not miss. Not because I dislike them, but simply because they do not matter to me at all.  Someone who has wronged me is a person because my mind is forced to deal with whatever they have done to wrong me, thus they have affected my life in a negative way. They are persons.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Interesting.

I was talking about grudges in the EZBoard version of DGN. This reminds me a bit of what I was talking about there.

Thing with me is, there was a time I'd hold a grudge against someone who wronged me. But now, I've found more peace in writing these people off. In your terms, they become non-persons for me.

Was a time I thought something was bad about that. But now, I realize, and find much peace in, how much easier my life actually becomes when I leave said person behind in the void of yesterday. I really can reach a point where there is no guilt in not contacting, bothering with, or even thinking of such a person ever again.

I'm working on that with a VERY close relative right now. She isn't quite becoming a non-person. But similarly to your idea, what is/was between us is becoming a non-issue. I'm realizing how little this person was EVER involved in my life, and how little merit her views have based on my realization of how she doesn't KNOW me enough to pass the kind of judgment on me she has. The more I've realized how little she's been in my life - period - the more I've learned it's o.k. not to miss her - how can I miss what was never truly there?

I can't quite write her off as a non-person, however. Mostly due to the fact that there will come a day when we're forced to see each other, at least be in the same room together - more than likely at a funeral. If it weren't for that inescapable fact, I could probably let her go further into "non-person" status.

In a way, that bothers me. That it could be so easy for me to just let people fall by the wayside. But I've reached a calmer, less frustrated point of maturity by not putting effort into people who don't enrich my life, rather, are a detriment for the most part.

Great post, Drew.

[Shade Everdark]

It's an interesting take on interpersonal relationships.

In most cases, it's something I'd tend to agree with, but being at City Club or at Luna present an exception to that general rule. At those places, especially when I'm there alone, without anyone I know around me, I tend to people-watch, and wonder what goes on in the lives of the people I'm watching. I wonder what they do when I don't see them, what they think about, what they fear and love, and how they deal with the world around them.

And there's the road people, too. Motorists piss me off too much to be completely considered non-persons....

[Daniel]

"Does anyone else feel similarly? any holes in this logic? (I'm sure there are dozens ) Anyone else have an example of how they see perceptual reality? Any other similar explainations? "

It is hard to point out holes in the logic, because you are primarily defining terms. You haven't made much of a statement at all. You haven't really laid out how these terms and perceptions effect your philosophy, behavior or overall outlook. If you are suggesting that "non-persons" have no significant effect on your life, you are obviously mistaken. What would happen if you removed all of the "non-persons"? There will be a very significant effect. If you can do without a few, you start to enter a pile paradox. How many "nonpersons" can cease to exist before it will have a catastrophic effect on your day-to-day life?

Plus, you have to consider the butterfly-flapping-its-wings effect. Every person, whether they directly effect you or not, creates huges ripples of cause and effect in the world daily. Removing even one from existence, even if you've never encourtered them before, could dramatically effect you in a very immediate way.

[gothicmom]

I tend to people-watch, and wonder what goes on in the lives of the people I'm watching. I wonder what they do when I don't see them, what they think about, what they fear and love, and how they deal with the world around them

I thought I was the only person out there that does that. I do it often, but only when I'm alone, because that requires deep thought with out distractions. Then the person looks at me.....as if they felt that I was thinking about them...and I have to look away....and come back to the real world :dizzy:

[nodrew]

Plus, you have to consider the butterfly-flapping-its-wings effect. Every person, whether they directly effect you or not, creates huges ripples of cause and effect in the world daily. Removing even one from existence, even if you've never encourtered them before, could dramatically effect you in a very immediate way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I was hoping someone would say that.

In all reality, the non-person thing was a giant hoax that I played on the denizons of Kalamazoo a few years back, that I thought was funny because to made people compete to try and be "people." I thought this was immensely funny. In the end, it really turns out to be a good way of describing people who are being drama bunnies and are almost affecting my life negatively by attempting to spread their noise.