Endometriosis...a.k.a. CANCER

[Nienna]

I got a new doc who is awesome.. no Lupron on the docket. She has a plan too... I'm pretty pleased so far... still feel awful though. :(

[Saephyr]

Awww sweetie I'm so sorry to hear that!

Ya want I should come over and rub your back and feet?

It feels a lot better when a man does it I know but I'm offering anway.

Pain clinic is Thurs..you may want to check into that...

Concert is fkn Wed night so that'll be a real bit of fun.

I have to go to CC this weekend to dance or I'll bust out and hurt something and I soooooooooo mean it.

[Nienna]

Pain clinic never helped me. I can really handle it ok on my own for the most part. The problem for me is the intense fatigue/melting sensation, the diziness and fainting and the shakiness and weakness. I WISH I just had pain. *sigh*

[Saephyr]

Oh yes! that's always a factor for me.

I get up from a wonderful sleep and have a conversation with my Spoon friend..then bang...I'm exhausted! It's so stupid! I have a nagging ass problem with heartburn and indigestion too. Wonder if that is a side effect I need to get addressed.

So you don't think my doc should even thet the Lupron on me to see if the ovaries shutting down for a short time actually fixes the problem? I mean it's just for diagnostics. You tell me? Can I go nuts?

[Nienna]

So you don't think my doc should even thet the Lupron on me to see if the ovaries shutting down for a short time actually fixes the problem? I mean it's just for diagnostics. You tell me? Can I go nuts?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Well.. My doc said Lupron is a terrible idea because: It can only be used for 6 months out of your whole life. Period. ever. So. If you do it now and later want kids or something you can't use it to restore fertility by using it to shrink the endo. I don't care about that crap but yeah. Also it's almost never a permanant cure, and has hellish side effects.

Hellish side effects for 6 months for maybe the same amount of time of relief.. and you can never do another run? Um. No. No thanks.

My doc is putting me on Seasonale and shutting down my gimpy ovary with mega birth control pills so I can still have normal hormones. It sounds like a MUCH better plan to me.

[Saephyr]

I started Seasonale about in October and I have been bleeding ever since. I got the Laparoscopy around the same time so I'm not sure what is causing what.

Doc said that he just wants to justify that ovary removal will stop the problem instead of removing it all and still having the same issues. I'm being torn in so many directions. All I know is if my migraines don't stop getting worse someone will soon be kicked in thier asshole!

I'm going to get another nerve block in an hour. These freak me out man cuz if he hits the wrong thing then what?

To top it off my damned so called boyfriend is on a holy roller trip again so I guess I have to let him go regretably.

[Onyx]

(((hugs)))

I'm having breakthrough migraines - damn things. They are not as severe as without my meds, but I am hoping this last cycle of them is over. I've been doing so well the last 6 months I forgot how much the damn things hurt!

Hope the nerve block helps.

[Nienna]

I was hopeful my new meds would have my migranes under control, but it's been constant for days now. Ugh. Maybe they need to up my dose? I need a full body transplant!

That news about the Seasonale is BAAAADDDD news. Ugh. I only have 1/2 a uterus and 3/4 of 1 ovary anyways.. I don't get why they just can't remove it. I can't have kids anyways. BLAH!

[Saephyr]

(((hugs)))

I'm having breakthrough migraines - damn things.  They are not as severe as without my meds, but I am hoping this last cycle of them is over.  I've been doing so well the last 6 months I forgot how much the damn things hurt!

Hope the nerve block helps.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

it's just for the Endo not the head. I'm so pissed I can't get this GONE for good. Try and get your inderal adjusted babe, it worked well so it just needs a tune up. Always your friend sweetie. :grin

[Saephyr]

I was hopeful my new meds would have my migranes under control, but it's been constant for days now. Ugh. Maybe they need to up my dose? I need a full body transplant!

That news about the Seasonale is BAAAADDDD news. Ugh. I only have 1/2 a uterus and 3/4 of 1 ovary anyways.. I don't get why they just can't remove it. I can't have kids anyways. BLAH!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

they are just freaking about you having to be on HRT this early.

Otherwise you could remind them that they are risking your life...Cancer hello! :blink

[Nienna]

they are just freaking about you having to be on HRT this early.

Otherwise you could remind them that they are risking your life...Cancer hello!  :blink

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Meh. They don't care.

[Saephyr]

So you turn into ULTRA TWATT and scream until they want to get rid of you so bad they'll do anything!

[Nienna]

LOL... Except.... Those are the same people I'm allowing to put me under and cut me open!

[Saephyr]

I'm taking that approach so I'll let ya know how that works out

[Nienna]

I'm taking that approach so I'll let ya know how that works out

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

LOL *HUgs and snuggles*

I woke up this morning feeling awful.. I wandered into the kitchen to find my girlie had left me this huge piece of cake! She must've picked it up when she went to Starbucks for coffee before work but it was JUST what I needed on a day like today for breakfast! Yay for good friends and chocolate therapy!

[Saephyr]

I can agree with that whole heartedly. I left the club last night so hungry I almost chewed my arm. No one worth a damn was open to go snag something vegetarian so I suffered.

I woke up to my Mum's cookies thought. She got me some for being in pain treatment the other day. Tried a new one too...Leon white chocolate chunk...very neat flavor. I steer away from cocoa due to the fkn migraines.

My b/f got his Dear John letter today as well so I'll be crying all day

[Nienna]

*hugs* That sucks. Just try to remember the reasons he's getting theletter while you're crying... will make you cry less.

[Saephyr]

don't really wanna cry less babe.

i like to have feelings and experiences to make me stick closer to my faith and beliefs.

i don't wish him ill...i do wish him Ma'at's justice...the realization that he loves me and always will

i just need to know that.

[Nienna]

don't really wanna cry less babe.

i like to have feelings and experiences to make me stick closer to my faith and beliefs.

i don't wish him ill...i do wish him Ma'at's justice...the realization that he loves me and always will

i just need to know that.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

*hugs* I know how it feels to be with someone who won't love you for who and what you are.

[Saephyr]

:tear :tear :tear :tear :tear :tear

Ok this is an official rant. Had a UTI, you know pissing razors...called my GYN knowing that it can be due to the Endo cimplications. He treated it. Got it again less than 2 weeks later, called agiain...he called in drugs for me. Called every 3rd day for almost 3 weeks to no avail until I FINALLY got a human on the phone. I was told "You need to go to your GP." Asking why was just about as dumb as the answer.

I finally am well enuff to go out. I have been walking with my stick and the pain is back full tilt so I need it. I go to the GYN office which is 2 blocks from the GP office. I sign in was told he had a delivery and would be back in a while. Explained what someone said about my infection and went down the street and told my doc what was up. He said things like why is he not treating you?, this can be due to your immune deficency is he not doing bloodwork?, why won't he give you the Hysterectomy to end this?, is all this bleeding causing extreme fatigue?, you told him you were BLEEDING and they didn't see you right away? So yeah, it fueled my fire ok.

I drove back to the GYN. guess what they said. It's too lat ein the day...he's leaving now. The bitch never asked him if he could see me since i have been BLEEDING for over 3 months!!! She gave me an appointment for the 27th...AFTER my family is in my face and scared to death when they see how awful I look. I'll be drunk until the 27th I guess to keep this pain in check. Vicodin is crap ok...crap. I may just take myself to the ER for a treat and make them call his rotten ass to deal with me.

I can't...but I want to give up.

Even my therapist won't see me until the fucking 4th of January..how do ya like that shit?

I'll take any donations of higher than 750 Vicodin I can handle guys. This is maddening. Not upsetting maddening, as in may drive me into the freak house for a while!!! WTF do these assholes think of me? They have the proof and yet they don't take me seriously in the least!

My boyfriend USED to be my big strong defender in this. He's gone and I can only let my folks do what they can. They are the whole reason I'm alive and can still even smile at all. my sis too naturally.

I dont know if I can really do this.

I'm losing my will to try and it's so unfair.

Can you all help me with some words of wisdom or intelligence to throw at these people so I can make myself heard?