It Doesn't Matter

[bean]

Would anyone notice

if I was gone,

that annoying

grain of sand silent,

no longer buzzing

in your ear?

My body nothing

but ashes in a box,

wasting less space,

no longer sucking up

valuable resources?

Would anyone care

that I never said goodbye -

not a note or a

reason as to why?

Why should it matter

to anyone,

When it doesn't even

matter to me.

[kellygrrrrrl]

I have been reading your poems.....they seem quite deep. To me, they say alot about you, and I am worried about you.

If it matters at all to you, I would care.

Have I noticed correctly that you are a therapist?

Just wondering......

[bean]

I'm a behavior therapist for special needs people (and in case you didn't know this, most therapists have their own therapists that they go and see). I see a therapist once a week, so it's ok. It seems like I'm really fucked up, but I only write when I'm depressed....it's just my way of getting things out. Some of the stuff that I've posted is old work. No need to worry, but thanks.

If you knew me, you would know that I laugh a lot....

[the eternal]

I would imagine thats a pretty taxing job. Anything involved with special needs is a handful.

I like the nihilism of the piece. I have those thoughts at times. I know a couple people in my life that would care,

but I get the feeling that although it would be hard on people on DGN if someone checked out, we would think they were just taking time off and not notice.

Unless its someone who is part of that core who keeps in touch with each other and then there would be a sad thread or two and after a little while everyone would move on,

because they'd have to,

to resume their lives

and not get sucked into the vortex of pain and sadness that took their friend's life

so theyd resume doing what they had been doing before

until it became so integrated that you could barely see the difference

Albert Camus' The Fall talks about this

LOVE that book!