Does it matter?

[soothsayer]

Does it matter what other people think?

Does anyone here feel the need for approval from thier peers?

I was just thinking about this and wanted to throw the question out there.

Do people (on dgn) seek approval but pretend to not care or do people here actually just do there own thing? Or is it a mix of both? What I mean by that is, is it sort of important to be accepted with the crowd or does it not matter at all?

For me I've always just been myself no matter who I meet. I'm not trying to single anyone one out but I was curious as to how other people think about others perseption of them. If I have'nt been clear enough just ask a question.

[The_Dark]

I would answer this post... but that would require careing about your question.

[torn asunder]

does it matter, or does it matter to you? big difference... it takes a lot of self-confidence and inner peace to truly not care what others think, and i don't know more than two people in my world that are even close to feeling that way...

[Ginevra]

I care about what others think if I'm seeking advice or just simply don't know what to do at all. However, there are other times when I really don't care what others think.

For instance, this past Wednesday, I changed the windshield wipers on the car. I went from work straight to Murray's but the car had been sitting there for 8+ hours so the snow had built up on it. I got the guy from Murray's to come out to change the blades for me because it's a free service they provide. So, the guy comes out and the first thing he says is "Well, if you'd clean off your car!" Okay, this was *definately* an instance in which I did NOT need to know what he thought about the condition of the car. I really, truly didnt care.

But my close friends, of which there are a *scarce* few, their opinions do indeed matter to me because I care about them and I value what they say/think.

[soothsayer]

Very well said Ginny.

[JaneDead]

I would answer this post... but that would require careing about your question.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

:laughing:

[Brenda Starrr]

I feel that either you like me or you don't, and it's okay. I DO care about the opinions of my family (meaning my husband and kids). My other relatives' opinions don't matter too much, as I'm quite different than all of them. They don't understand me. Again, it's okay with me.

[LuluVox]

I tend to only care about what the people I like think.

[The_Dark]

To be honest.. I'm vain as hell.. so yeah... what people think of me matters. OK, not all people, some can just go hump a rock for all I care.

[Brenda Starrr]

go hump a rock for all I care.

:woot: :woot: :woot:

[Marblez]

Yes, it matters to me what people think. I surround myself with people that I like and enjoy. Do I change myself in order to make them approve, not likely. But it does matter.

[Jarodaka]

Does it matter what other people think?

Depends on the person and how much their thinking influences my life. The thinking of my boss and George W. Bush, for example, have a great impact on my life. Joe Blow across the street, who cares if he doesn't like my coat or thinks I stay up too late?

Does anyone here feel the need for approval from thier peers?

Not me.

Do people (on dgn) seek approval but pretend to not care or do people here actually just do there own thing?  Or is it a mix of both?

Approval for what and by whom?

What I mean by that is, is it sort of important to be accepted with the crowd or does it not matter at all?

Ah, 'approval' by peers to 'fit in?' Complete and utter nonsense. Your crowd should be determined by who you are and what you want to be, not what others expect of you or want from you. (Unless, of course, who you are revolves around doing something criminal or immoral, but that's a whole 'nother set of issuess...)

For me I've always just been myself no matter who I meet.

There ya go.

[Shade Everdark]

I prefer to go the route of Machiavelli; I want to be feared. So far, that hasn't been working out too well.

[JaneDead]

it matters to me what people think. not what they think about ME but what they think in general. how they feel about things. how their actions are based on this. how their interactions with me are based on this. what their beliefs are. their goals. their thought process in all of this. but not about ME.

if i were to do something to someone and make them feel bad in any way - then i would care what they think of ME in that instance.

[Kit Kat P]

To me it matters in so much as how much it affects my life. Getting a job, scoring a date.... but actual opinons of me don't really mean much to me. I'll be who I am and it bothers someone, well it bothers them and not me.

[freydis]

some things, doesnt matter.

but others.... it does.

[Scales]

It's taken me a long time to realize it but I love people, and I love people being as openly blunt as they can with me. I can only make loose assumptions of what people I don't know think of me, I don't think it's smart to do it any other way. I've already been through and constantly go through staying truthful with myself so I don't fall into self-deceit, there's not much anyone can say that can come close to the negativity I've attacked myself with over the years (also, kudos to a bad parent, fucked systems, and religion). I have my own thinking system, and I try to analyze outside negativity rather than making the mistake of reacting to it with a manner that would mindlessly propagate it.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

The one and only time I'll ever seek approval is when I want to somehow justify some really fucked up shit I did. Other then that, most people think I'm a sociopath, because well maybe I am a little bit. I think most of the people at City Club on the other hand get me. I love the fact that I can be me, and actually feel accepted by people in our great society somewhere. I don't do things to seek this acceptance or approval however. I'm just my social insane self and people seem to like this for whatever reason.

AND YES I ALWAYS CARE WHAT OTHERS THINK

Not about me persay, but I care that most people don't think enough of others to fucking do something about our government. I care that everybody hurts. I care that people are unhappy because our government is spending $23,000/family in wasteful spending alone when all of us could probably really appreciate that in our tax returns. I care that our lives suffer because foreign affairs that feed the rich steal from our plates. I care that drug dealers spend more time in prison than child molesters. I care that people concern themselves enough with the affairs of others that they think homosexuality or abortion are moral choices when really they should just mind their own fucking business. I care that more time has been wasted in congress in the past ten years on these two issues alone than has been spent on education reform. I care that every time a reform bill is passed, it has loopholes as well as expenses attached that both contradict the reform and assist campaign contributers. I care that despite all of this we are still a bi-partisan country. I care what people think EVERY FUCKING DAY BECAUSE WE SUFFER FOR THE THOUGHTS OF OTHERS. I even care that our Constitution can be circumvented by Executive Orders.

[Steven]

well I think its a bit deceiving to imply that you dont care if you bother posting, because obviously you do.

I do (care).

I dont however - need to have agreement from the receiving party, in fact that almost never happens here.

But I think personal expression is important, speaking your mind is important, for the good of the whol as it helps to influence us all. even my psuedo conservative right wing judeo christian self has learned a great deal from everyone thru these interactions.

Be yourself though. I sometimes think that certain charactors are assumed in this online vehicle. Be the same person in a written format that you would be conversationally.......just be. Thats one of the reasons I dont have some spooky or interesting avatar name. My name is steven, my mom pretty much is repsonsible for that, so there ya go you get what you get. But be real. There are some folks in here that would look outside and say 'precipitation is emminent" when in reality in a regular conversation you'd just go "dude its raining" I prefer the latter because I trust it more.

oh, and I almost never spell check. its a glitch of mine but I live with it.

[kellygrrrrrl]

hmmm....

heres my take

I am me....

theres nothing I can do about that.

I really don't care about acceptance...although it feels good....I mean everyone wants to be accepted or at least know they are ok.

I've learned that not everybody is going to like me.

And I am ok with that.

=)

I'm not gonna force someone to like me.

[Steven]

hmmm....

heres my take

I am me....

theres nothing I can do about that.

I really don't care about acceptance...although it feels good....I mean everyone wants to be accepted or at least know they are ok.

I've learned that not everybody is going to like me.

And I am ok with that.

=)

I'm not gonna force someone to like me.

I love me. I mean you.

[Homicidalheathen]

Heh I think we all know the answer to that as far as I go.

EVERYONE CAN GO SCREW THEMSELVES.

[Destroit]

I only care about what people think in certain instances. Like if I went to a party and got really really fucking drunk and took off all my clothes and ran around naked humiliating myself and my friends and being a jackass...yeah then in that sort of an instance I would probably crawl under a rock and live there for years on after that. But lifestyle things for instance, one particularily that pretty much all of us have in common (i.e. gothyness, for those of you who don't pick up subtle stuff easy ), I don't care what people think about that. I get shit for it all the time, I'm used to it, and when people ask my "why" I'm armed with an explination, but don't always feel the need to give it if someone's being a dickwad about it. You should care what your friends and family thinks, and public also but that's only if you're doing something mortifying while realizing you're doing it and it's all your fault basically.

[Homicidalheathen]

Like if I went to a party and got really really fucking drunk and took off all my clothes and ran around naked humiliating myself and my friends and being a jackass

.....hell at the parties I go to, thats whats SUPPOSE to happen!

LOL!

Does this lampshade look good on me? Match my skin tone? Cause its all I am wearing tonight....whoo hoo!