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You already are. The more operative mantra would be: Someday I'll respect myself enough. Someday I'll appreciate my beauty. Someday I'll come to terms with the fact that to have a healthy relationship: I need to have a healthy outlook. I need to work on my dependency issues (so I don't immediately attach myself to another in an unhealthy manner and depend on that other to fill in what I perceive I lack in myself.) I NEED to stop tying in MY self-worth to the person I'm in a relationship with. It's MY fucking self-worth. I need to find it in ME. -------- You have all the tools. You need to use them. Wallowing in self-pity will never solve your problems. Until you seek betterment, all you're going to do is stay in this rut. Although for all of us (at least a good number of us), it's a little annoying to read the exact same post said in different way over and over and over again for the past year on DGN/Facebook, honestly the person that should be the most sick of it...is you. (And if all you do is focus on the last sentence I wrote and twist it around, it'll be clear that you did not actually read and take in what I'm putting out here, but just looked for negativity and drew from it to continue this pity party that you seem focused on) Just to be even more clear, since you twisted around the last time I posted to better serve your pity party, we're not sick of you, we're sick of seeing you post the exact same expression of pain, when we know you have it in you to stop. EVEN if you don't think you can. We know that you have that ability. Start working on change! PLEASE--read this, re-read it and actually try to consider putting this into practice. If you're trying to get our attention--well you got it. But it's been a loooong time. Now, you have to do the hard part. Put in the work and build toward recovery.