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I don't know why I'm posting right now, but I just really need to talk to people, even though I really have nothing interesting to say. Life in a loveless marriage really isn't a life worth living, and if it wasn't for my son I would've left months ago. I know I need to file for divorce, and not just live separated, but something in me won't let me do it. I don't love her, hell I do t even like her! Feelings seem to be mutual. I haven't had sex in a year, and anyone who knows me knows the level of drive i have. financially, she's killing me. I have several legal cases against me now because of her shitty money managing, and I'm in severe debt. The kicker is, if I would just leave and only be responsible for myself and my son, I'd be debt free before 2017, and I could return to school that fall...so why can't I pull the trigger? shes killing me slowly, she's killed my passions, my enjoyment, and she's destroyed my self confidence. I talked to a shrink twice, and she doesn't think I need meds or anything...just that I hate my marriage. now I'm by no means suicidal, I would never kill myself...but the thought of death is quite appealing at this point (no this is not a cry for help! I wouldn't let his bitch beat me!) I'm just very alone

I had a good time. Was nice to see everyone as usual. I'd type more but I have 5 different DGN "things" to do before I can attempt sleep! Hope to see you next week! I hope you enjoyed yourself if you went. TronRP won All The Cards Tron post your picture! *stomps foot* =D

Wow...making such generalized, vague statements like the above on a site like this practically screams for the need of an explanation.

It was fun. However, trying to convince a woman that giving a guy wood is a compliment is insulting. Especially if that's why you're asking for a long hug. I'm a lady not a whore.

It was nice seeing everyone and meeting a few new ones.

I would really like to go. I'm curious how it is since the last people that managed it ruined the club.

May 12th is Fibromialga & Chronic Pain Awareness day. It and closely associated problems (ME/CFS & FM) are really horrible but you can't 'see' them. But they are real. May 12th has been designated as International Awareness Day for Chronic Immunological and Neurological Diseases (CIND) since 1992. The CIND illnesses include: Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (ME), Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS), Fibromyalgia (FM), Gulf War Syndrome (GWS) and Multiple Chemical Sensitivity (MCS). May 12th was chosen as it is the birthday of Florence Nightingale. She was believed to have suffered from ME/CFS

Like gyms do. Lol Hey, maybe you could work at a child care center, start you're own babysitting service, or work at the school maybe in the latchey program or while can you work day time hours, maybe when the kids are at school? Department of Health and Human Services may pay a portion of the payment for you to do work related activities. I'm not sure if you qualify it's the state..maybe this will be helpful http://jfs.ohio.gov/CDC/childcare.stm

Yeah that's basically minimum wage since they don't get health care or pay into social security. Unless you really know someone that just "wants to help" (like an actual friend) if you find a babysitter willing to work for less than 9-10 bucks an hour I'd actually red flag that and look for the next babysitter. A good babysitter is a higher skillset and requires a GIGANTIC level of trust over say.. stocking the shelves at Meijer or flipping burgers at McDonalds. Unfortunately for the person on the "paying" end. 15 years ago it was a bit different , but these days a decent babysitter isn't a "dumb" job let's call it. Babysitters never should have been since you know, they are taking care of your children rather than like say, bagging your groceries, modern society ... at last (fortunately or unfortunately) realizes it now. Even still , they work pretty cheap considering what (good) ones do, although when you are strapped for cash it doesn't feel cheap. *sadface* I see great deals on things sometimes and I'm like... ONLY 50 bucks for THAT MONITOR.. OMG... wait... its still 50 bucks... nevermind.... *slinks away* :(

I'm so sorry about all of this. I hope you find a suitable option very soon.

I know. After I wrote it all out and re-read it I was like "what was I thinking?" I don't know about DHHS. I'll give it a look. Be really cool if employers built daycare rooms on their work site. That's a good ideal.

With all the love and respect from one parent to another, never, ever let this woman near you're children. I understand it is different to find childcare but this is an emotionally and mentally abusive person. No way. Not in a million years. I mean you're intuition has already given you the answer. I know it's hard to listen especially in desperate times. You know it's a bad idea, she treated you like crap and is probably in need of a replacement victim... So, of course she is going to offer to babysit...but that's just my opinion. Can you qualify for DHHS childcare assistance? I think they pay something until about age 12. I know how hard it is. Hugs.

Omg, so easy but so very funny! Right!!!!!! She just summarized the whole thing in less than one paragraph ¡!¡¡!¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!

Yeah, this is a promotion. They really aren't losing anything since everything they sell is already marked up nearly 150% over what they purchased the item for. By the time you buy the $50 gift card you've already paid for the $10 that's supposedly free. This a very common business practice regardless of the company's size.

Well if I have to buy something to get something for free then its not free.

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

Free money ? Come on now, are you actually gonna fall for that?

Well its a longshot, but you could always look for a therapist that uses Emotionally Focused Therapy or EFT, its the most successful couple's therapy and claims a 70% success rate, there's also a book called Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson that's around the same thing and cheaper. You could also try to recommend The Surrendered Wife by Laura Doyle to her, that book has worked for a lot of women for saving their relationships. And then there's The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman which is a bestseller by another couple's therapist. I was sort of forced to study these things to keep evidence of evolutionary psychology from tearing apart my sanity. If you file for divorce you want to hold your anger back like a god, be as calm as possible and get on as good of terms as possible with this woman first, to figure everything out, because she could royally fuck you. I personally wouldn't recommend marriage, or joint bank accounts between people in relationships, to anyone who hasn't already done it. Primarily men. Good luck.

I think you are in one of the most difficult spots one can be in.... I am sorry.

Sounds horrible. Change can be really hard. But from the sounds of it, I can't encourage you enough to just DO IT. Depression is probably also a key problem holding you back (I've never been in your exact situation but I know its a huge hurdle) sounds like you need to GTFO ASAP though, as the longer you wait the harder it will be typically. *bro hug*

I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. I was in a loveless marriage for a couple of years and it sucks. Best wishes to you.