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Wear a tighter shirt to hold em in place idk?

Thanks but I have had the equivalent of 10 brains processing power crunching variables and tangents on the matter of solving, fixing, repairing, saving this thing over the last uhhh years... Ever since 2016. I broke my own values for her demands, I swore never to marry and above all i swore not to propagate the genes of my psychotic bloodline or punish any soul by bringing a life into this wicked world. On 5-27-2016 my firstborn Lilith Kay White entered the world. The following years worsened much more and I revised my purpose from things I had learned, my final line in the sand was to not to pass on generational abuse. I have made hard enough efforts at times that it should've saved 3 marriages and still cant get her to alter any aspect of her behavior, not even look inward and contemplate if her actions are doing harm, definitely not admit anything. Its always blamed on the most illogical far fetched bullcrap. Anyway lemme shorten this up. 12-02-2020 a son was born now, an awfully blond son who she really really wanted to name after me. (Fast forward to now, the general area of time that the "Ah-ha" evidence is dated from is near the time of this surprise unexpected pregnancy, we didnt want more kids) but wait, heres the crazy $h¡† Kat, the moment Levi was born all things changed, took a hard turn towards way bad. I immediately felt nothing towards Levi and couldnt understand why, she had brought unwanted attention upon our home. I fixed the home problem but she goes on to have bad bad postpartum depression, so did i perhaps, most that year she wouldnt communicate, we lost any sense of intimacy between us i recommitted my effort to do the work to save a marraige, we both start at something like a marraige counseling app we got she slowly looses interest and quits then im the only one continuing to work and learn, then i give up. And I've been pushed into a lot of workaholism and hard drugs because of her but i have never been tempted, i have never cheated, my mamma raised me good like that but now i no longer care. Im using her logic with me in 2014, she "didnt want to breakr vows" then found out good enuff evidence her husband was unfaithful so she was then free to lay with me. Maybe yesterdays values are no longer applicable in this world idk. But i learned and grew a great deal thru this, i still believe it all was meant to be. I doubt I'll end up "revenge cheatin" on her somehow, since i have no experience randomly hookin up or dating. Ive moved from long tern directly to long term directly to lobg term relationships. But my values and perspective have drastically changed this week. I dont care what color the grass is or i i end up on a desert island, my kids have been raised so totally wrong and are in a dangerous situation i cannot express publicly. Youd have to hit me up in a message or something for the fill in the blank info there. But i could make a call now and have my own kids taken away tomorrow. I gotta stop this typin now. Thanks fo lettin' me vent yo!

We could write a whole ass book of hymns partner!

~~~~~ You know my brain got stuck on your last sentence...🤣

Who me? Lmao I'm doing better, though. Agreed, everyone needs more head.

~~~~~ And you would have to excuse me because, as kat knows, I'm a drama vampire. I read everything. I just don't like when someone gets stuff off their chest then go and delete it...you know who you are...😆 I am firm believer of there is more room out than in and multiple heads are better than one when needing to see things from various perspectives. Good conversation is good for the soul. 😁

Hell, I wub you both. And here I thought I had forgotten wut wub wuz. Weird. Lol

No not you lmao, God. I was gonna add that in there, reckon i should've lol. It's a lyric in an FJ Outlaw song that was playing right when I finished writing the previous big wall of drama spam

That was stressful typing idek if anything's spelt right toward the end i was bangin' fingertips down like i wanted the phone to die, then it almost did. It crashed and was froze for about 3 minutes. My crazy discord friend Straaya said that months ago. I found her server and returned to DGN bout same time but Ive tried to be respectful of DGN and not make it my drama dumpsite. Straaya's server was a lawless land within discord tho and mostly was only 3 or 4 of us poppin up on there so she became my innermost circle, we had each others back and gave support, advice, and positive mojo out. Ive even shown the screenshots of conversations with my wife showing how unreasonably volatile her responses to anything and everything can be. I had cut all my ties in the world years back i lived only at work or at home in self imposed prison with my wife and kids and the mountains of filth they create whenever I'd be out of town. And you just dont discuss these things at work, we arent people here. We are machines. Now with Straaya gone, Kat, you and TronRP have found yourselves seated at the head of my street family. I'm sure i am about to be flying blind thru a toxic divorce with high stakes and I'll need trustworthy objective consults along the way. I have to do everything in my power for Lilith, and Levi even if he may not be mine. There nothing legal to prove tha. O xannot allow my children to be raised by someone this dangerous and unstable. Im breaking my oath, i swore i wouldnt write no more of this subject, like at 5:00pm or somethin omg.

I wub you.

~~~~~ Dude, I'll just say this, there's a reason I nicknamed her "Hot Chic".

Oh damn, yea fuq that shit time to go and vent away that's what we're here for. Hugs and healing and positive thoughts to you.

That's a whole ass blues song right there 🎵 "Well I'm just a stank, Detroit River fish..dadumdadum, Noone ever eats me and I have a death wish, dadumdadum" Oh well I'm an old stanky, Detroit River fish, I can't get no woman to birth me some kids, dadumdadum Stanky old River, oh That's where I still lie, eternally trapped here, why can't I just die" Dadumdadum.

@WhiteLines we could write a whole ass song my friend.

Much respect and the hugz right back at you. Its mind freakin' boggling. I'm a highly intelligent person and skilled with crisis management, diplomacy, communicating, uhhh logic. And on the other hand, she did not graduate HS or get a GED, and in her younger years she had just enough IQ to be above the line of mental retardation, yet I've never met someone so skilled at at carjacking conversations and fights, it's as if some unholy entity controlling the strings. And is also an expert at creating enough chaos to keep me from ever adding all the figures up at once and all I want is peace quiet and everyone to be happy, so eventually Id let $h¡† fly just to avoid any confrontations. Muddahfawka' i feel like the dumbest sunovabeech realizing each of my relationships ended with me being betrayed in the worst of ways and this one here potentially has become my greatest towering monument to being betrayed but at least i know what to tattoo all over my back now... Knives.

Yea, I been through the speedball journey. When I was going through my divorce and shortly after joining DGN. Prior to that I was almost like a 1950s housewife except I worked also. I cooked, cleaned, wore whatever clothes my ex husband liked lol, carried our son while going to college, working, and doing my internship, popped him out went back to work like a good little girl, even had to take our baby to work with me sometimes when I had to just be in the office 😅 I remember not having a babysitter for my daughter when I was pregnant and taking her to classes with me....she hated that shit..I felt like a single mom and was like why the fuq are you struggling still and you got a husband? He literally just knocked you up and left you to deal with all the details on your own..that's some single mom shit. The day I gave birth to our son, he took me to the hospital, refused to let my mother come be with me while I gave birth and most women want their mommy there when they're having a baby..I sure did and we had a shitty relationship but still needed my momma and I had our son, he dropped my daughter off at the hospital with me the next day cause we had no babysitter while his ass went to work even though he had unused time to take off. Omg I didn't mean to turn this into a rant..dude I got off on a tangent...my apologies. Anyway, lol you totally just said that we should think of you as a dude that committed suicide and then said don't worry! Bro!! Now we're totally gonna worry.

Hey but you know what they say, just because someone's is paranoid about something doesn't mean it's not true! Frfr, you ever seen someone diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia..like, yea they paranoid but they be right about shit, though 🤣💯

Lyrics in a Burden song that features Kevin Gates on it also... They think I'm paranoid, maybe I'm paranoid. Lol

Dang holy smokes that was one good burn! Yes I should have, and did in fact know better. I'm sure the surface on the drama has only just now been scratched tho. LOL I'm just being over the top sarcastic as an inside joke to myself since what your posted fits my life so well at the moment.

I'm in a lot of pain. Diabetic peripheral neuropathy is painful in the cold weather, but summer heat/humidity causes its own issues - including swelling of ankles/feet and mine are epically swollen right now. Add in just general aches and pains in the upper back/shoulders, I'm falling apart LOL. But I just keep on going...

I'm tired of drama from people who should be old enough to know better

There's truely no better way to act at all than actin' a fool yo! High five!