Is It Ok To Be Open Minded?

[DeadBurgerKing (10)]

When it comes to certain situations and topics I'm very naive and gullable...that may sound bad..but in turn being that naive I'm not subjected to discrimnations or hates...I have no reason to hate...or discreminate...I recently have befreinded a transexual (I will not name names for sake of my freind). I stupidly told my mom about it...I have no opinion on the matter...I don't see her as a transexual..I see her as a person..I see her soul and who she is...my mother scorned me for it...told me the "bads" of it...why is it bad? Isn't it the person inside that matters? She has done nothing wrong...it's not like she robbed a bank or commited murder...so why treat her like that? Why treat anyone like that?

Am I being naive? Am I being stupid and just not seeing the wrong? Or is there actually nothing wrong with what she wants to do with her body? And if there is something wrong with it...what is it? And what are the reprecussions? Will it affect her? Would it affect me?

I'm just so god d#%n frustrated over this...wtf is wrong with society to force people to stay in their houses just to avoid reticule from the outside for being themselves?!

[Msterbeau]

You're fine... and your mom is... um.. prejudicial.

[Homicidalheathen]

I am rather surprised at your moms response......it is becomming so common these days...yes it is extreme unnessesary surgery but so is a face lift.....boob job.......ect......ect........

I am glad you are open hearted enough to befreind this person. Kisses to you!

[Onyx]

Sorry you are having these issues. My mom used to be very very closed-minded. Something as small as me being friends with someone who had a visible tattoo would freak her out.

She's changed quite a bit as she's gotten older. In fact, she went to Convergence with me and loved it, and she got really gothed up and looked damn good doing it. She's not ths same person she used to be.

Maybe your mom means well. Sometimes we just need to overlook closed-minded people and hope they will change in time. In the meantime maybe avoid the subject and just try to live the way you feel is right.

[Msterbeau]

Maybe your mom means well. Sometimes we just need to overlook closed-minded people and hope they will change in time. In the meantime maybe avoid the subject and just try to live the way you feel is right.

Educating someone is always a good idea... sometimes they educate themselves, but it never hurts to give them a hint.

[BrassFusion]

Surprised you even had to ask this, yeah... your mom's being super-judgmental and the tranny probably won't "taint" you somehow. Hell, how many people WOULDN'T get a sex change if it were cheap, complete, quick, and reversable? I'd be first in line... I just wouldn't get permanent surgery to change myself into a guy who still looked like a girl.

[Fierce Critter]

I dated a guy who didn't tell me he was a transvestite until after I'd already fallen hard for him.

The rest of the relationship was me trying to "deal" with it, and stay open-minded enough to accept it and not see it as weird, bad, etc.

We broke up actually over something different. But after we'd been broken up, he tried to get me back. But by then, I'd been able to step away from the relationship and had some epiphanies. And I told him that as a straight woman, I couldn't deal with the nights he was "one of the girls" because my interest in him as a partner would disappear, or I'd be forced to almost try to "bisexualize" myself, which wasn't a fair thing to ask of me.

But I countered that by saying that I had realized that the entire time I thought I was trying to accept him as he was, in truth, I was hoping he would change. And that it was just as unfair for me to expect him to change as it would have been for him to expect me to change.

We parted friends, with a much deeper understanding of ourselves.

I am totally non-judgmental of transvestites, homosexuals, transsexuals, bisexuals, etc. I can be friends with anyone falling into those categories. I do not ascribe to a particular religion or mindset that says what they are are "sinners" or evil people of some kind. So it's not even a matter of "loving the sinner, hating the sin".

Your mother is obviously doing that - placing a moral judgment upon this person. It's right for you to make up your own mind about how you feel about such people. And personally, I think it's great that you don't have a problem with them. But you have to come to terms with the fact that your mother feels differently. What you need to work out is not really how you now need to view your mother in a negative light, but to view her with the same kind of non-judgement and understanding you have for your friend.

Understand where your mother comes from. If she's not the type of person with whom you can have a non-confrontational debate/discussion about this subject, step back and just see where she comes from, and file it in your "things we can't agree on" file, and remember the "things we do agree on" file that makes you love her.

[Troy Spiral (13)]

An open mind is asking the devil to fill it up with his bad ideas. Critical thinking is of the devil. Everything you need to know you learned in church. Outside of that? Waste of time.

Bad associations spoil useful habits

To quote a WH40k source: "An open mind is like a fortress with its gates unbarred and unguarded"

"Bad associations spoil useful habits.” (1 Cor. 15:33)

Serioiusly thats how i was taught. (minus the wise-ass WH40k Quote)

I didnt start to re-educate myself until late teens and even then it was pretty scary for me. Your going to find what i'd call overly close minded (aka "judgmental") people everywhere. Have to decide for yourself if being "open minded" is good, or if its just a way for the bad guys to get you to change your mind.

[Steven]

"Bad associations spoil useful habits.” (1 Cor. 15:33)

Serioiusly thats how i was taught. (minus the wise-ass WH40k Quote)

this is from the New World Translation - Watchtower Bible and Tract Society.

and what does the Watchtower bible and Tract Society do?

divide and conquer. seperate and maintain. seperate sheep from goats and apostates.

I am both a goat and an apostate.

In their world.

In my world, there is freedom.

[Steven]

and in closing, your Mom unfortunately, seems to make decisions rooted in fear. Im sorry about that. Be who you are, love who you do, do the best you can with what you've got to work with.