Questions

[odims_sphere]

Questions that really need answers

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,

"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here,

and drink whatever comes out?"

2. Who was the first person to say,

"See that chicken there?

I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares,

why is there a song about him?

7. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for

the time, but they don't point to their crotch when

they ask where the bathroom is?

7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are

going to look up there anyway?

8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

They're both dogs!

9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme

crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from

vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

12. If electricity comes from electrons,

does morality come from morons?

13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle,

Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

14. Stop singing and read on..........

15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face,

he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride,

he sticks his head out the window?

17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once

make it arrive faster?

[Msterbeau]

24

[phee]

*ponders*

[Rayne]

I know, I know!!!

Red 5

[phee]

You sank my battleship

[Der Nister]

Q.

The answer is always Q.

[Vampyro]

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,

"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here,

and drink whatever comes out?"

A:An extremely deranged and peverted farmer mixing the whole baby role play with beastiality.

2. Who was the first person to say,

"See that chicken there?

I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

A:Someone who couldn't catch the chicken themselves.

3. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

A:Freezes the light bulb perhaps, or maybe they just want everything to fall on you while digging blind in the freezer.

4. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares,

why is there a song about him?

A:No one did care, except Jimmy, and feeling neglected he sold his soul to the Devil for a catchy song that would get him noticed for doing such a fucking hic thing.

7. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

A:NO, car's don't swim in pools.

6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for

the time, but they don't point to their crotch when

they ask where the bathroom is?

A:You've never met me yet.

7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are

going to look up there anyway?

A:To hide the fact that they're perves who are getting their jollies off your black hole.

8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

They're both dogs!

A:Walt Disney was batshit insane. He was Dishonorably discharged from the USMC (wich probably fucked his head up even worse) on a section 8 (section 8 means you're batshit insane... so much infact, you're too much for the marines to handle even) We'll get to hear his answer in 200 years once they can figure out how to put his cryogenicly frozen head into a life support jar like they do in Futurama.

9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme

crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

A:Wile E. Coyote is a genius, meaning he's dumber than shit when it comes to common sense

10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

A:don't you mean testes?

11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from

vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

A:Aborted fetuses... what else? Hope you're not using aborted fetus jelly as sex lube... you sickos

12. If electricity comes from electrons,

does morality come from morons?

A:I would have to say this is true, the dumber people are, the more up tight they are about "morals"

13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle,

Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Someone stole the song, but no one caught on because the only time you're into those songs is as a kid, once you're old enough to catch on, you've already been corrupted by real music.

14. Stop singing and read on..........

15. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

A:No, they just get frusterated that they can't communicate with their soup.

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face,

he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride,

he sticks his head out the window?

A:yes I have noticed.

17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once

make it arrive faster?

A:No, but since you're imatient ass is so focused on hitting the button repeatedly... it just seems quicker.

[DarkVampire]