Security Guards Inspect Hole In The Ground (seriously)

[AntiHero]

While it may or may not be known, at present I work as a security guard for Visteon/ACH/Ford in Dearborn, MI. Within the past week the rest of the staff and I were given the task, to be performed twice during our shifts, which is to inspect a hole in the ground. For legal reasons, we cannot refer to it as a sinkhole, we can only refer to it as a hole.

Regardless, I have felt it appropriate to illustrate the fact that it symbolizes everything I (we, the security staff) have been doing for the past several months. Namely staring at a hole in the ground drying to figure out whether or not it's our ass(es).

In my opinion these moments are among the most beautiful moments in life.

[know_buddy_kares]

so.... let me get this right...

if you don't look in this hole... you get canned?! wtf?!?!

like are the chinese trying to dig through the earth for an invasion or something??

[Azeuron]

no no its the mole men they're coming to take over starting at ford in dearborn everyone must be alerted

[Destroit]

I think the Succubus must have busted out of Hell again and is now on the loose...

LADIES - Hide your men! And whatever you do, no matter what the heathen Succubus tries to tell you, do NOT, I repeat do NOT lend her tree-fiddy (Three Dollars and Fifty Cents, US Dollar).

You've been warned.

[Destroit]

Wait...wait...waitaminute!

I just caught something after posting...

What you're telling me AntiHero, if I am indeed getting this down correctly because I've been known to make mistakes before, is that you actually receive money to stand at the edge of a hole in the Earth, watching it all day to make sure that it doesn't go anywhere?

Man, where the hell do I get that job? My high school counselor certainly didn't run that one by me, that's for sure.

[odims_sphere]

Well.... I think a little more information would help. How big is the "hole"?

Security means you protect your employer from risk. A deep hole is a risk. By inspecting the hole regularly you effectively, and cost efficiently reduce the risk. It's cheaper to have you look at the hole every so often to make sure that nothing has fallen in the hole, or taken up residence in the hole than it is to actually fix the hole.

THink of the army risk management process

1. Identify Hazards

2. Determine initial risk level

3. Develop controls

4. Determin residual risk level

5. Implement controls

6. Supervise

7. Evaluate, were controls effective

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

So, the fact that you cant not call it a sink hole should tell you something. A sink hole is a HUGE danger and an insurance laibility.

Did this hole just appear one day? how deep is it? Are you over an old salt mine thats collapsing? Are you over limestone deposits that are being eroded by water flow?

If it really is a sink hole.. I would not stand too close to it...

[odims_sphere]

So, the fact that you cant not call it a sink hole should tell you something. A sink hole is a HUGE danger and an insurance laibility.

Did this hole just appear one day? how deep is it? Are you over an old salt mine thats collapsing? Are you over limestone deposits that are being eroded by water flow?

If it really is a sink hole.. I would not stand too close to it...

Very good points.

Most likely, given that it's Dearborn, it's probably water erosion. With all the auto manufacturing in the area there is a layer of steel slag through out most of the Dearborn area which acts a lot like limestone.

[Destroit]

Well.... I think a little more information would help. How big is the "hole"?

Security means you protect your employer from risk. A deep hole is a risk. By inspecting the hole regularly you effectively, and cost efficiently reduce the risk. It's cheaper to have you look at the hole every so often to make sure that nothing has fallen in the hole, or taken up residence in the hole than it is to actually fix the hole.

THink of the army risk management process

1. Identify Hazards

2. Determine initial risk level

3. Develop controls

4. Determin residual risk level

5. Implement controls

6. Supervise

7. Evaluate, were controls effective

Oh come on Odims! So much imagination and you give such a serious yet very feasable and most likely correct answer to the solution?

You KNOW you want it to be mole men or succubi (the plural for succubus) because you will finally have a chance to utilize that very lethal tape gun you have. It'll rock, you bring the tape gun, I'll bring the spud launcher, Candy can bring her kick assness and we'll bag them bad guys! What better way to spend the weekend right? Phee can even come and throw crepes at them, for taunting purposes.

We'd all be like Robocop, collectively, except you three wouldn't be robotic at all.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

I did litte research and I find out the Dearborne area is over karst. Karst is a type of lanscape with water soluable rocks... limestone, dolomite and gypsum being amoung the chief types... Sink holes are common because rainwater turns acidic when it mixes with CO2 in the air and soil.. and a manufacturing area has lots of that... this disolves he rocks underground...

[odims_sphere]

Well.... I think a little more information would help. How big is the "hole"?

Security means you protect your employer from risk. A deep hole is a risk. By inspecting the hole regularly you effectively, and cost efficiently reduce the risk. It's cheaper to have you look at the hole every so often to make sure that nothing has fallen in the hole, or taken up residence in the hole than it is to actually fix the hole.

THink of the army risk management process

1. Identify Hazards

2. Determine initial risk level

3. Develop controls

4. Determin residual risk level

5. Implement controls

6. Supervise

7. Evaluate, were controls effective

In your specific example:

1. The hole

2. Moderate. We get this from running the risk assesment matrix which is severity x probability. In this example based on what no actual knowledge but rather an idea of what the sink hole is the severity is critical and the probability is seldom, resulting in a moderate inital risk level

3. Have security periodically check the hole.

4. Low. We get this from re-running the risk assesment matrix. The severity stays the same but by having security watch the hole the probability is reduced to unlikely.

5, 6, and 7 are currently in action.

The risk management process at work!

It may sound dumb to stare at a hole in the gorund, but once you understand why it makes more sence.

[know_buddy_kares]

no no its the mole men they're coming to take over starting at ford in dearborn everyone must be alerted

Woah mole men? It's dangerous to go alone, take this!

He's had experience with this sort of thing and is ready for more action!!

[phee]

so.... let me get this right...

if you don't look in this hole... you get canned?! wtf?!?!

like are the chinese trying to dig through the earth for an invasion or something??

I've had dates like that

[know_buddy_kares]

I've had dates like that

wow... and I thought I had bad luck with women....

[Burrich1]

I've had dates like that

Wait... You dated a Chinese girl trying to dig thru the earth for an invasion...

Or you took her on a date where you tried to dig a hole to invade something?

Or were you just forced to look in her hole for the entire date?

[AntiHero]

Ok, here's the deal. We had some underground fuel and oil tanks removed in Nov '07. Now that the area has been repaved and filled in the earth is settling, there is now a 4 foot long, 2 feet deep hole sinking into the earth near the pathway. One of the buildings has been sinking into the Earth for the past couple months. ACH isn't doing anything about it, they're gonna be shutting down in a couple of months.

Present day, for whatever stupid reason, we have to get out, stare at the hole for a minute, then call it in. The hole isn't doing anything wrong, it's just there. The underground tanks have been removed, there is no danger of gas leakage, odor, or discharge so why in the hell are we so worried? That's like worrying about a spayed cat getting pregnant. Here's what I reported tonight.

"Unit two to command."

"Go two."

"Inspected hole outside of Lima Sierra Zero Three Seven, Detected No Odors or Unusual Discharge."

My supervisor was quite amused by the report.

I just posted because the thought of a bunch of rent-a-cops watching a hole in the ground is quite amusing. I'll take my camera in and get pictures of the hole in the next day or so.

[know_buddy_kares]

"Detected No Odors or Unusual Discharge."

OMFG! That sounds like some test result from the VD clinic!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh wow.. but yes this story is quite amusing.

[Der Nister]

I suspect that it's a worm hole and it's being guarded so only a few people can use it to travel to other planets.

Or maybe not.

[Draco1958]

I suspect that it's a worm hole and it's being guarded so only a few people can use it to travel to other planets.

Or maybe not.

Maybe there is a ring around it with weird hieroglyphics on it. I call in a Stargate team to investigate. Might be a wormhole the goa'uld might use to attack earth.

[Daevion]

at least they didn't have you driving around in grandma's mini-van checking live animal traps......actually the hole in the ground is way more amusing! LOL

the rent-a-cop gig = getting paid to be bored all day

[Tryp]

I'm in the hole