My Apology To The World

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

Why I come off as arrogant and mean and nasty sometimes....

Ok. I am willing to admit to God, my Father Joseph Remisoski, and you people that I am a failure. I have failed to control my anger and my pride for so long that it's eating away at me.

I see people at a gas station pumping gas. Freezing their asses off. I can't help but shake my head. It's a simple world with simple rules, but people are so rebellious that they're more hell bent on destruction and chaos than they are about creative solutions.

I mean really. We have the technology existing within our vehicles to heat said vehicles. So if we kept enough gas in our cars (and I've been guilty of this one but not to this extreme point) where we can't even make it to the gas station without heating our vehicles on the way at least, we could hit the notch on the pump, sit in our cars, let it fill, CLICK, get out, and put it back.

You don't even to watch the pump, because if you knew what the fuck I was talking about you'd know for sure that the CLICK means the fucking pump when it's done pumping the fucking gas.

To top it off. Some cars have gas covers on the driver's side of their vehicles. Why is this? I mean really. The fucking automobile is an American invention. It also happens to have some roots in Detroit. So if this is true, then wouldn't you assume that Detroit was pretty fucking cold sometimes?

How old is tobacco? I'm sure it's been here a lot fucking longer than cars. If we're smoking in our cars, and we absent mindedly flick our butt outside the window while pumping gas, what are the odds of the pump exploding? What are the odds, if someone on the passenger side flicked their cigarette butt out.

While, I'm on that topic, who is more likely to flick a cigarette out their window and blow up a gas station.

A) A stoned guy who's on the driver's side who's a little bit stressed about driving, his day, whatever, because drivers sometimes stress out about shit.

OR

B) The passenger who's relaxed and enjoying his buzz.

OR

C) The guy who or girl who drive alone to the gas station and have the gas cover on the passenger side of their vehicle.

On another note,

My friend Matthew. Who is a self proclaimed expert mechanic could not give me the proper terminology for a gas cover. Do any of you know?

Thing like this just piss me off. It's not the fact that most of you are probably dumb, but probably more likely that a lot of you probably just aren't thinking. Idle hands Idle hands......

Seriously there is some truth in this. Would you like to watch the world collapse around you because you refuse to understand a few basic thing about human beings and what we should expect of ourselves? I mean really should we aim high? Should we not live up to our potential? Our we even worthy of carrying our family name or being children of God if we don't try to be the best people we can be every FUCKING DAY OF OUR LIVES!!!!!

I mean WTF seriously. I have kids man. I suck as a father. I'd like to be better. I'd like to do JUST ONE FUCKING THING TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE FOR THEM AND NO ONE FUCKING UNDERSTANDS!!!!

I FEEL LIKE MY KINDNESS AND CREATIVE EFFORTS IN THIS WORLD ARE WASTED!!!!

So yeah, I really am very angry, and that is why I'm such a prick. I don't mean to be, and I'm working on that. I realize it's a problem, and might be willing to seek medical advice.

The main point is. Every fucking time 4:20 rolls around, I feel like I know something you don't, and like you refuse to learn anything at all to help me. Is it not our responsibility to be stewards of this world? Am I wrong for feeling like we're failing in our responsibilities to our children by being indifferent TO ALL THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT IN THE WORLD????

AM I SO WRONG THAT I WANT THE TRUTH AND I'M SICK OF FEELING LIKE A SLAVE TO A SYSTEM THAT WANTS TO SUCK THE LIFE OUT OF US AND OUR KIDS UNTIL EVERY LAST DOLLAR IS OOZING OUT OF THEIR FUCKING BLOODY SOULS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So yes, I apologize. I REALLY DO SUCK AS A HUMAN RIGHT NOW. I'M HAVING A HARD TIME DEALING WITH ALL THIS ANGER. MY FRIENDS ARE HAVING A HARD TIME DEALING WITH MY ANGER. AND ULTIMATELY, EVERYTHING SUCKS BECAUSE OF IT. SO UNTIL I GET HELP OF SOME SORT. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. I REALLY DON'T.

IF I DON'T GET SOME CERTAIN PROJECTS DONE THAT I MIGHT NEED HELP WITH, I MAY BE FINANCIALLY RUINED AS WELL.

IF I DON'T GET SOME HELP, WITH FIXING STUFF HERE. I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN FIX THEM BY MYSELF.

AND THAT REALLY HURTS

AND THAT REALLY SUCKS.

AND THAT REALLY MAKES ME FEEL.

like the saddest, loneliest, most pathetic human being on the face of this planet, and i have not felt any different since.

i was 13 year old.

So I am sorry. I am doing what I can to resolve my anger issues.

i mean seriously.

this shit sucks. i never wanted to get this personal. i'm not a maniac. i just want change. i'm not charles manson or jesus christ. i'm just some dude that loves god just like you.

maybe you don't love him but thats the only thing separating us if this is true.

so why do i have to always be the one to compromise?

because i have to be. that is the end of that question.

i am infinitely sad right now, and i expect that God probably feels about the same way.

i'm sure a lot of you feel the same way you do.

i'm sure a lot of you will see the truth for what it is.

i'm sure a lot of you will completely disregard this.

or call me an egocentric for saying this is the truth.

i kinda give up man.

bang. blood on the floor.

haha fooled ya. not yet.... =D

i'm not that crazy.

anyways, yeah. this sucks. does anyone want to help?

i don't have medical insurance.

i don't want medication.

i can't afford a doctor right now.

do any creative thinkers in here have any solutions for my anger?

i mean really i'm going to get personal here.

i live in an upper flat.

i'm not as successful as i'd like to be.

every day my life hangs by a shoe thread.

because everything i earn i give away.

i do keep a few things for myself.

i don't know what i can do.

it just doesn't seem like this karma thing really works at all......

so do you have any suggestions?

i mean really. i'd have more cash, but i need to give it to people to get things done.

i need to give it away so i can help someone other than me.

and just have enough to get by.

can anyone help me curb my anger.

so i can do something better?

i've been trapped in this fucking apartment.

my car doesn't work.

nothing in my life works.

and every day.

i just want to cry.

because this world sucks.

and i can't change it.

and no one wants to help me.

i just want to die.

can anyone help me??? please?

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

Not trying to deflate you...

but I will bet you a dollar a cig wont start a fire with gasoline. Infact, I'm willing to put a cig out in a gallon of gasoline.

BTW, it's illegal to pump gas and get back in your car unless you are in full view and easy reach of the pump... like it's on the drivers side. Why? Because it might fall out and pump gas into the ground water.

And why is it so important what side the fueling port is on? Fuel/Gas Door, Gas/Fuel Cap, Fuel Down Spout, Fuel Vent Tube, Fuel Tank

Maybe you should stop freaking out over simple little stuff like people pumping gas.

[know_buddy_kares]

heh yeah.. back in the marines.. I flicked cigarette butts out in JP-8 all the time to freak out the newbies... when dealing with hazardous material, more specificly fuels, every fuel has a certain flash point, meaning the temperature has to fall within a certain level for there to be enough fumes to be combustible. So maybe in a warm 80 degree day it's possible, but if it's winter time... there's really no way gas would egnight. too cold for it to produce enough vapors.

And yeah, I won't deny your life sounds like it sucks ass right now, but you aint the only one. life just fucking sucks period. The best you can do is keep on trying. You're only truely out once you give up.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

I think you missed the ending i had to edit and add on.

sorry about that.

also wanted to mention. i don't want financial help. i just want some help. i'll trade monetary compensation or whatever you ask of me.

just please help me.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

I've been trapped in this apartment for months.

By choice.

I could have went out.

And got another job.

Or got my car fixed.

But i just have enough.

To get by.

To pay for my projects.

To pay for my goals.

To pay for my dreams.

I don't need financial help.

God stuck me in the hellhole for a reason.

And If I have to.

I will remain here.

Forever.

In this shitty flat.

With no heat.

And work every day of my life.

FOR YOU.

I guess I'll see what happens.

Maybe some of you feel me and know exactly what I"m saying.

Maybe some of you are feeling like you are me, and you know EXACTLY WHAT THE FUCK I'M TALKING ABOUT.

WELL PLEASE TELL ME

IF YOU CAN

HOW CAN YOU HELP ME

HOW ARE YOU MAKING IT

WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?

WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP FIX THINGS?

I KNOW DAMN WELL I'M NOT DOING ENOUGH.

I KNOW I'M A LOSER.

THAT'S OK.

I DON'T WANT TO BE A LOSER ANYMORE THOUGH.

I DON'T WANT TO BE A PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A HUMAN ANYMORE.

AND I DON'T WANT TO BE A HYPOCRIT ANYMORE.

I AM WILLING TO DIE

FOR WHAT I BELIEVE IN.

BECAUSE IN ALL HONESTY.

IF YOU CAN'T HELP ME.

MAKE THIS WORLD BETTER

FOR OUR KIDS

THEN KILL ME.

I DON'T WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE.

PUT ME ON A CROSS.

LET ME SUFFER LIKE JESUS DID.

BECAUSE I LOVE HIM.

MORE THAN YOU.

I'M SORRY.

BUT THAT IS MY ADMISSION.

I AM A FAILURE.

AND I'LL PROBABLY BE DEAD BY THE END OF THIS YEAR.

IF I CAN'T FIND A WAY TO AT LEAST.

FIX MYSELF.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

I forgot to mention that yes my friend also made this point about it being illegal to do this. Well, why is it illegal to pump gas and get in your car? Is the gas pump really unattended if you're in a vehicle that is attending the pump? I don't know. Sounds like some kindergarten shit to me.

So if you're in a vehicle and not paying attention to the pump at all, then perhaps you are neglecting your duties, however, I really don't think a gas pump requires your 100% full attention.

The man who wrote "Everything we ever needed to learn we learned in kindergarten" I've always assumed was a very smart man. Despite the fact, that I have never personally read this book and would fully appreciate a loan or trade on this book, so I don't have to waste money needlessly and you can get something in return. The reason I assume this man was smart, is simply because I agree with the title name he chose as a personal statement.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

Hell, I'll even admit that trade alone cannot work in this system.

However, I do believe that one day it could. I also believe that money and trade together would save a lot of Americans money. Really you did learn this though. Oddly enough, it was in kindergarten when you learned to share.

[Brenda Starrr]

Kevin....

All I can offer is my friendship. And a hug or two. I wish I knew what else to say.

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

On a trade note.

Money is just an idea, and it's distribution is unfair.

A mixed economy only allows for someone else to set the standard.

Let us run our own economy. Let US SET THE VALUE AND SEE WHO'S WILLING TO PAY FOR IT.

LET OTHER PEOPLE DECIDE THE WORTH OF OUR WORK, WHILE WE DECIDE THE WORTH OF THEIRS.

THIS IS THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE.

THIS IS THE WAY IT SUPPOSEDLY IS "SINCE IT'S A MIXED ECONOMY THAT IS REGULATED BY THE GOVERNMENT"

BUT THE GOVERNMENT DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW.

THAT IT'S YOUR RIGHT TO ENFORCE YOUR OPINIONS AND PASS THEM THROUGH CONGRESS.

IT'S YOUR RIGHT TO COMPLAIN ABOUT UNFAIR TAXES AND UNFAIR PRICES.

IT'S YOUR RIGHT TO LOOK INTO IT.

IT'S YOUR RIGHT TO STIR UP SHIT.

IT'S YOUR RIGHT TO SAY HE DAMMIT. THIS IS MY MONEY AND I WORKED HARD FOR IT. I WANT TO PAY A FAIR PRICE, AND NOT THE PRICE OF SOME GREEDY SON OF A BITCH THAT DOESN'T WANT TO FUCKING WORK FOR ANYTHING AND JUST WANTS TO SIT ON HIS ASS AND COLLECT COLLECT COLLECT. FUCK THAT SHIT. IF I WORK YOU SHOULD BE WORKING TO ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE ARE MORE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD THAN YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Steven]

Do you want to meet with me?

[crunchy_pickle (5)]

Do you want to meet with me?

any time bro. 734.250.1942

pm me yours so you won't have to give it to everybody if you choose not to. also, if you'd like you can come over. apartment smells like pot, and it's cold, but it's clean mostly. =D well, there's a little clutter.

If the FBI or CIA who most likely did not previously have this information would like to come arrest me for no reason whatsoever that would be amazing.

If someone would like to come kill me. I wouldn't mind that so much either.

However, any of you on this forum are welcome to now publicly have my address for the first time ever.

(edit my g/f asked me not to post an address that only the post office and electric company have so I decided not to. sorry. we can meet other places though unless your name is Steven or Gaf for the moment or anyone else who responds.)

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

see pm

[Steven]

here come another PM....

[know_buddy_kares]

I honestly do feel your pain. I've been in the shithole for a long time because of america's shitty fucking economy. Personally, I joined the military to get my finances back on track. That's the only fucking reason why I'm in, they're the only ones that pay decent and don't get rid of you on a whim. Hang in there and keep trying, you'll find your way and break out of this pile of bullshit you're under.

[odims_sphere]

I forgot to mention that yes my friend also made this point about it being illegal to do this. Well, why is it illegal to pump gas and get in your car? Is the gas pump really unattended if you're in a vehicle that is attending the pump? I don't know. Sounds like some kindergarten shit to me.

So if you're in a vehicle and not paying attention to the pump at all, then perhaps you are neglecting your duties, however, I really don't think a gas pump requires your 100% full attention.

The man who wrote "Everything we ever needed to learn we learned in kindergarten" I've always assumed was a very smart man. Despite the fact, that I have never personally read this book and would fully appreciate a loan or trade on this book, so I don't have to waste money needlessly and you can get something in return. The reason I assume this man was smart, is simply because I agree with the title name he chose as a personal statement.

It's been proven that it is possible, (unlikely, but possible), to build up a static charge from getting in and out of your car which can then be discharged against the cars frame as you reach for the pump to pull it back out of your car. That small discharge has also been proven to be able to ignite the fumes coming from the gas tank.

A highly unlikely event requiring perfect conditions, however the risk is enough to warrent the rule.