Sex Offender Wins Raffle for Abuse Victim Charity

[TitsMcGee]

ANCHORAGE, Alaska — A convicted sex offender won a $500,000 Alaska raffle that was a fundraiser for a nonprofit organization that helps victims of sexual abuse.

Alec Ahsoak of Anchorage, 53, came forward Saturday to collect his prize.

The state sex offender registry lists Ahsoak as convicted of two counts of sexual abuse of a minor in 1993 and one count in 2000.

The raffle drawing was Friday night.

State law says all games of chance must benefit a charity. The designated beneficiary for the half-million dollar raffle was Standing Together Against Rape, or STAR.

Ahsoak says he plans to use the money to buy a home and to improve his life. He tells KTUU-TV he will donate $100,000 to STAR.

Whoops?

[taysteewonderbunny]

Um, laws of statistics says it had to happen eventually. But, yeah, that is kind of weird.

[Der Nister]

Well ain't that a kick in the head?

[Simon Bar Sinister]

ya buys yer ticket, ya takes yer chances

[TheGimp]

aint that about a bitch

[Scary Guy]

The last straw is when Peter tears up the city's water irrigation system in order to use its pipes to make guns, outraging the citizens. Meanwhile, Stewie has "gained girth" according to Lois. He suddenly lays a single egg, commenting how easy that was and not seeing what women complain about (evidently referring to the pain of childbirth); however, he then lays hundreds of eggs with Stewie ending up on top of them.

Peter is eventually kicked out of the town he founded, and his family follows him, deciding where they should go next: a Carvel factory in Framingham, Massachusetts. Meanwhile, the citizens burn the guns while Stewie's spawn hatch. They attack the citizens, some of whom comment on the irony of the situation.

[Goth Brooks]

That 400k will buy him one bad ass van and a shitload of lollipops.

[Rev.Reverence]

...isn't it ironic...don't ya' think...

~Allanis Morrisett

[Homicidalheathen]

lets go beat him up and rob him...oops...

[tanuki1985]

That 400k will buy him one bad ass van and a shitload of lollipops.

You, my kind sir, have officially won this thread.