Don't mind me

[saechalyn]

The people that I attract and the people who are attracted to me are never the same people. It's gotten to the point where it happens so often I know it's got to be something I'm doing, but damned if I can see what it is. On the rare occasion that there is a mutual attraction there is always some stupid timing/distance/whatever issue to screw it up.

People who get attracted to me fall into one of two categories. Either they are just looking to get laid (no thanks) or they become intrigued with the idea of me while knowing very little [or nothing] about who I am. Then they either find out I'm not whatever they thought/hoped I was and just want to be friends, or they come on way too strong and fast, which is a complete turnoff. I guess that's actually 2 main categories with the option of sub-categories. In any case, it sucks.

/whine

[float]

that does suck, maybe you could simply enjoy the fact that they are enamoured (spelling?) with you.....at least for a little while.

that couldn't last, but it might help you to not be so bothered by the whole thing

just a thought...I'm no expert

[Vivian]

The people that I attract and the people who are attracted to me are never the same people.  It's gotten to the point where it happens so often I know it's got to be something I'm doing, but damned if I can see what it is.  On the rare occasion that there is a mutual attraction there is always some stupid timing/distance/whatever issue to screw it up.

People who get attracted to me fall into one of two categories. Either they are just looking to get laid (no thanks) or they become intrigued with the idea of me while knowing very little [or nothing] about who I am. Then they either find out I'm not whatever they thought/hoped I was and just want to be friends, or they come on way too strong and fast, which is a complete turnoff. I guess that's actually 2 main categories with the option of sub-categories. In any case, it sucks.

/whine

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

yeah, thats sucky. i completely sympathize with you on that one... Can we just kill off a few select males from the species?? *sounds very appealing to me*

[Troy Spiral (13)]

I think a similar version of your post should have been my signature for the last 5 years.

Wish i had a solution for you, all i can offer is an ear and/or a shoulder if nessisary, unfortunately. =(

hope your not feeling too downhearted

*hug*

[Nienna]

*Big hugs* You are such a sister to my heart sometimes sweetie...

I totally know this feeling... It's my life too. You meet someone and you feel like pounding nails into your head because you can't take it again, but you still want to try "just in case". I've gotten so paranoid now that it's hard for me to even trust people as friends anymore.

I don't think it's you. I think it's actually a pretty common problem.

[Homicidalheathen]

I have exactly all of these same problems. It isn't you. It is just the world. Oh and the fact that maybe your a tad different from main stream....which is a good thing but makes it hard to find freinds and form relationships that have all you want because you looking for someone that may not even exhist.

The people that I attract and the people who are attracted to me are never the same people.  It's gotten to the point where it happens so often I know it's got to be something I'm doing, but damned if I can see what it is.  On the rare occasion that there is a mutual attraction there is always some stupid timing/distance/whatever issue to screw it up.

People who get attracted to me fall into one of two categories. Either they are just looking to get laid (no thanks) or they become intrigued with the idea of me while knowing very little [or nothing] about who I am. Then they either find out I'm not whatever they thought/hoped I was and just want to be friends, or they come on way too strong and fast, which is a complete turnoff. I guess that's actually 2 main categories with the option of sub-categories. In any case, it sucks.

/whine

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[kellygrrrrrl]

I think in a way that is good.....it weeds out the simple minded people that you obviously are too good for.

Also, I think it would be nice to have someone be intrigued by me.....

I am not a very inriguing person....at least I don't think so...?

There is someone out there just for you.....you just have to go through them to find him. :cheerful

[saechalyn]

Thanks for the responses. It's not horrible and life-shattering and I hate to bust out the violin, but dammit I'm a goth and I'm entitled every now and then

hope your not feeling too downhearted

It's not something I sit around and dwell on usually- on the contrary, I've never been one to play the "oh, poor single me" card. I don't need another person to complete me, my life is pretty good as it is, I have a life, I have friends, I have fun, I go out, etc., etc.

But at the same time, I'm 27 years old and I've never been in love. I've dated here and there and had what one might call "complicated friendships" but nothing that I'd call being in love. That's starting to wear on me. All that "the right person will come along when you least expect it" and other trite bullshit really has no meaning anymore- people said that to me 10 years ago.

I'm not in any big hurry to settle down and I don't want kids (now or in the future) so that's not a factor. But at the same time it would be nice to share my life with someone, even if it's not in a forever kind of way. I don't have some kind of impossible standards- I don't require drop-dead gorgeous and I couldn't care less how much money someone makes, etc. I also don't have some disney-fied vision that "the one" will come and sweep me off my feet or some other romance-novel-induced bullshit.

At the same time, I know it could be worse. If I wanted to just hook up with somebody for the sake of not being alone I know I could. I see a lot of people do this and it's not something I ever want to fall into. There's nothing wrong with being that way, it's just not who I am. I mean jeez, I've watched people get manipulated into being in a relationship and they go along with it and [i guess?] end up happy, or at least ostensibly appear that way. Whatever floats your boat I suppose. I *think* I have a decent balance of not compromising my standards and at the same time keeping those standards realistic, but damn the wait is lonely sometimes.

[Troy Spiral (13)]

At the same time, I know it could be worse.  If I wanted to just hook up with somebody for the sake of not being alone I know I could.  I see a lot of people do this and it's not something I ever want to fall into.  There's nothing wrong with being that way,  it's just not who I am.  I mean jeez, I've watched people get manipulated into being in a relationship and they go along with it and [i guess?] end up happy, or at least ostensibly appear that way.  Whatever floats your boat I suppose.  I *think* I have a decent balance of not compromising my standards and at the same time keeping those standards realistic, but damn the wait is lonely sometimes.

Very true and very well stated, and i completely understand.

[Daevion]

I am not a very inriguing person....at least I don't think so...?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

So you say...but.. I'm sure there's someone who is intrigued by you.

[Therapyfaild]

The people that I attract and the people who are attracted to me are never the same people. It's gotten to the point where it happens so often I know it's got to be something I'm doing, but damned if I can see what it is. On the rare occasion that there is a mutual attraction there is always some stupid timing/distance/whatever issue to screw it up.

People who get attracted to me fall into one of two categories. Either they are just looking to get laid (no thanks) or they become intrigued with the idea of me while knowing very little [or nothing] about who I am. Then they either find out I'm not whatever they thought/hoped I was and just want to be friends, or they come on way too strong and fast, which is a complete turnoff. I guess that's actually 2 main categories with the option of sub-categories. In any case, it sucks.

This sums up a good portion of my dating life nicely....

At the same time, I know it could be worse.  If I wanted to just hook up with somebody for the sake of not being alone I know I could.  I see a lot of people do this and it's not something I ever want to fall into.  There's nothing wrong with being that way,  it's just not who I am.  I mean jeez, I've watched people get manipulated into being in a relationship and they go along with it and [i guess?] end up happy, or at least ostensibly appear that way.  Whatever floats your boat I suppose.  I *think* I have a decent balance of not compromising my standards and at the same time keeping those standards realistic, but damn the wait is lonely sometimes.

I agree completely.

Also, I think it would be nice to have someone be intrigued by me.....

I am not a very inriguing person....at least I don't think so...?

Everyone and anyone is intriguing to someone who wants to know them. The whole of a person's being is only lacking in intrigue to the simple minded.