Lady, drop that vibrator

[Onyx]

March 21, 2006 | 9:20 a.m. ET

Mississippi outlaws sex toys (Dan Abrams)

There is a landmark legal battle of constitutional proportions being fought down in Mississippi. It involves fundamental rights protected by the First and Fourteenth Amendments, not to mention the rights of certain small business owners to satisfy their customers. This week, another court refused to recognize Mississippians’ right to find companionship for 29.99 and so a law outlawing the sale of sex toys will stand.

“A person commits the offense of distributing unlawful sexual devices when he knowingly sells, advertises, publishes or exhibits to any person any three-dimensional device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs or offers to do so or possesses such devices with the intent to do so.”

Well, I am glad to see that the local legislators are focusing on the most pressing issues of the day. I’ve long believed that a three-dimensional, possibly battery-operated device is far more menacing than a handgun. In Mississippi, people can buy guns at a gun show with no background check and certain weapons can be carried almost anywhere. Sure, guns and toys can bring joy and a sense of comfort to the user, but apparently the legislators concluded that a genital replica is a far greater threat to society.

This, from a state that levies only an 18-cent tax on cigarettes, 55 cents below the national average and where 62 percent of residents are overweight, making it the fattest state in the country. Yet still the public schools don’t make gym class compulsory. Mississippi’s laws would make you believe sex is the single greatest threat to public safety and well-being. After all, it’s illegal in Mississippi to have sex with someone you’re not married to or to live with someone other than your spouse.

Both can result in a $500 fine and six months in jail. And men are not permitted to be aroused in public. :blink But at least good people are protected from the disfigurement that could result from an accidental electrical overload from a defective toy.

Georgia and Texas have passed similar bans and courts have repeatedly ruled the legislators have the power to do it. I guess the Second Amendment doesn’t say anything about the right to bear a stimulation device.

But the sex activists are not closing up shop in the South Pole just yet. They formed a lobbying group based in Florida called the National Alliance of Adult Trade Organizations or NAATO. Not, of course, to be confused with the other NATO, which is based in Brussels.

I don’t mean to pick on Mississippi. I love the state and the people, but I just don’t get why the legislators are fighting so hard for this law. We’re talking about adults here. It’s not that I really care about ensuring that these toys are ready accessible. Really. It’s just that you have to wonder, is one of these toys really a greater threat to the community than what real live people do to each other every day?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6308419/

[The_Dark]

I dont remember Sex toys being mention in any of the Amendments in any way shape or form. So far, no court can find them either. Don't get me wrong, I'm not in anyway supporting a ban on sex toys. I just dont see how anyone can say they are a constitutional right and not expect people to think them crazy.

[Msterbeau]

This could reasonably fall under the 9th amendment... Privacy being one of those not specified by the constitiution. I'm thinking a person's sex life (As long as it doesn't infringe on other rights) is nobodies business but the people involved.

[Onyx]

I dont remember Sex toys being mention in any of the Amendments in any way shape or form. So far, no court can find them either. Don't get me wrong, I'm not in anyway supporting a ban on sex toys. I just dont see how anyone can say they are a constitutional right and not expect people to think them crazy.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No, but as far as I'm concerned it falls under "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness".

I'd be pretty unhappy right now if they took away my sex toys.

(Yeah, I know that's not in the constitution and the article does seem to emphasize that but it's all so completely ridiculous to me that this is an actual law and they are actually fighting over it)!

[soothsayer]

The whole point here is this - the government is working at taking away our liberties wether they are spelled out in our constitution or not. Things of this nature have no business being outlawed.

It's nice to know that law makers are getting rid of such dangerous items such as this, so what's next - Lubricants?

Thank God they're on top of this mennace.

[FarrIL]

Well, isnt it obvious why they're outlawing sex toys? They want us to fuck fuck FUCK and make babies.

Oh, and while you're at it, create profile on an adult hook-up site and fuck some more.

And while you're re-arranging the walls, invite the neighbors over for a fuck-fest and fuck til dawn.

MMmmmmyep.

And by the way, while you're fucking, you cant f*cking use that f*ckin' vibratin' egg because it's F*ckin' outlawed.

Pardon that rant folks but this is just plain stupid. It's great to see that state after state AFTER state is trying to find some new and even more personal way to poke holes into our personal lives, not only just to piss us off but make us feel like voyeur victims because Big Brother's always gotta be watching us.

What a crock of shit.

First South Dakota bans a woman's personal right to abort a child, and now we cant buy dildos in Mississippi? Why dont I just go down the street to the Porn shop and buy out their stock and hide it all so the cops cant find it when toys becoe illegal in Michigan?

What the F*ck ever. This country is becoming progressively dumber with every freakin' month.

[soothsayer]

Not to distract from this thread but I found this site (DUMB LAWS) and figure if anyone wishes to see just how many stupid laws are passed they can check it out.

[The Rod]

First South Dakota bans a woman's personal right to abort a child, and now we cant buy dildos in Mississippi?  Why dont I just go down the street to the Porn shop and buy out their stock and hide it all so the cops cant find it when toys becoe illegal in Michigan?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yeah, and apparently the government has forgot their whole campaign about safe sex, and avoiding HIV and STDs. "Hey, why don't we preach against sex, then take the other options away?" Ridiculous...

[The_Dark]

I'd just like to point out... These are not New laws. This is not something that just popped up. Sodomy laws have been around for a long time. Contrary to what people are saying here... in the last 10-15 years we have been getting More freedom sexually as state after state has dropped thier Sodomy laws.

[kellygrrrrrl]

Yeah, and apparently the government has forgot their whole campaign about safe sex, and avoiding HIV and STDs.  "Hey, why don't we preach against sex, then take the other options away?"  Ridiculous...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

my thoughts exactly....

[Shade Everdark]

And, if I remember correctly, court after court has upheld this backwards law in Mississippi.

It sure seems like backsliding to me.

[n0Mad]

It sure seems like backsliding to me.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Mmm ... backsliding. That's probably illegal too. :laughing

[Steven]

dumbest fucking thing I've heard of, and what a monumental waste of taxpayer money.

rub your hoo-haw however you want, with whatever you want.

[Brenda Starrr]

Arrest me.

[Msterbeau]

Arrest me.

I'll let someone else do that. I just wanna be your cellmate.

[Brenda Starrr]

You can be my bitch.

[Shade Everdark]

You can be my bitch.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You, uh, you realize what kind of mobbing you're setting yourself up for with that comment, right?

[Brenda Starrr]

You, uh, you realize what kind of mobbing you're setting yourself up for with that comment, right?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Don't make me call you THAT name.

[Msterbeau]

Don't make me call you THAT name. 

You already did... :fear

And It's your turn to be MY bitch. Daddy needs his feet massaged... :laughing

[Brenda Starrr]

No. I've been standing ALL day long. Rub MY feet. Bitch.

[Msterbeau]

No. I've been standing ALL day long. Rub MY feet. Bitch.

Brenda, Brenda, Brenda.... :erm

Tell ya what. You rub mine and and I'll give your ass the spanking it deserves.

[Brenda Starrr]

Brenda, Brenda, Brenda....    :erm

Tell ya what.  You rub mine and and I'll give your ass the spanking it deserves.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

If you only knew what a good foot massage does for me, you wouldn't be such a weenie right now.

[Msterbeau]

If you only knew what a good foot massage does for me, you wouldn't be such a weenie right now.

No. It's because I DO know what a good foot massage does that I'm being such a weenie.

[FarrIL]

^^^ Always IS a weenie, that's how he gets away with this kind of behavior.

Too bad we cant get away with the purchase-of-self-stimulation-devices behavior.

Dumbasses. e.e

[Msterbeau]

*Evil laugh*