Over populated?

[kellygrrrrrl]

See this

I am 26 years old. I am married. I don't think I want to have children.

This is not something I came to overnight.

I would love to have children. I think they are a blessing. I think they are rewarding. I think they are beautiful.

on the other hand, I see a trend. Things are getting worse, and I think will only continue to get worse as the population BOOMS. And it is.

everything is so hecktic, everything is violent, kids are learning at a faster rate, they are smarter, more bored, they are tuned in to TV, PC's, and Gaming, here is more pressure on them form thier peers than I can remember when I was a kid, drugs are more available - at a younger age, exposed to sex earlier, families are ripping apart more frequently, last I checked the divorse rate to marriage was like 50/50... I actually think the divorse rate was slightly higher, we only pass our mistakes down, I think OUR generation is the beginning of degeneration...and the more we breed, the worse it will get...afterall, kids absorb what we teach, and what we teach is what we know, and what we know, may not be the right thing, only scarring generations to come.

I watch those Nanny 911 shows....these kids are nuts! And quite honestly what I see in a lot of my friends kids. KIDS SCARE ME! OMG!

I see my friends and thier kids. 2-3 of these kids are CRAZY! On meds cause the parents can't deal with the kid.....kid is sedated, and becomes dependant from an early age that pills make everything better...

So many children are born and unwanted....are sitting in foster homes, or on the streets, or starving in another country....or down the street for that matter....

Yet, we keep breeding.

I think life is hard. I think it is continually getting harder. Why would I want to bring an innocent child into such a rotten place? I know, that is bad to say, but somewhat true....it is what we make of it.....Not all is so bad when you look at the silver lining on the clouds, but admit it...things are crazy hecktic

I know I am selfish. I know I am broke. I know I am immature, so why would I want to do that to my kid?

There is nothing more rewarding than to see a child smile or laugh. I would love to wake up to a my child staring at me from the edge of the bed....to play dolls, or eat birthday cake....

but it seems so unfair to bring someone into my mess and the rest of the worlds mess.

Granted, some children were born unplanned, condomn broke, birthcontrol oops, etc....

Maybe my mind will change, but I think that this guy has some good points. I am definately on the same level.

^^ above link^^

I would like to think that I would set a good example as a parent. I think I would be an excellent mom. But, it's everyone and everything out there that scares me.

For now, I can only set examples for my friends kids, or family memebers children. I am fine with that.

:fear :fear

[The_Dark]

Your right... we do teach what we know. That means we should be teaching what we know to be bad along with what we know to be good. The traditional way to do this is reward/punishment. Bad behaivor gets punishment, Good gets reward. People don't do that anymore. True punishment has been declared child abuse. I'm sorry... Spank that spoiled rotten little monster once in a while and it will stop being a spoiled rotten little monster.

[kellygrrrrrl]

Your right... we do teach what we know. That means we should be teaching what we know to be bad along with what we know to be good. The traditional way to do this is reward/punishment. Bad behaivor gets punishment, Good gets reward. People don't do that anymore. True punishment has been declared child abuse. I'm sorry... Spank that spoiled rotten little monster once in a while and it will stop being a spoiled rotten little monster.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I couldn't agree more Dark.

I git spanked with the wooded spoon, the belt, backhanded across the face, I even had to "fetch my own switch" a few times.....

Guess what....I never did those things again!

You don't have to tell me twice.

I also have no lingering ill effects from that either. I wasn't abused in that fashion. Nor do I consider what my parents did to be abuse. I am greatful for it...I think I am a decent human being.

It makes me thing that swatting your kid in the face for swearing at thier elders is "Abuse" ...NO....you respect your elders- lesson #1. SMACK* bar of soap.

No, you cannot discipline your child in a physical manner without being threatened to have them taken away.

If you don't have a handle on your kids by age 5 when they start going to school, you've got trouble on hand.

The most valuable of lessons should be taught before age 5.

If you smack your kid, they tell, you get them taken away. How sad is that.

-again- another thin line.

What is disciplinary action? What is abuse?

Leaving a mark is abuse. Calling names is abuse. Certain words are abuse.

Your thoughts?

[Homicidalheathen]

I used to be a zero population growth person. I was single. I wanted kids...didn't really have a steady job. They wouldn't let me adopt thus. So I got pregnant. Its kinda dumb considering how well my kids turned out.

All these unwanted kids....I didn't care about race...but didn't really want one with a handicap. I know that is selfish..but I know my limits.

Just think it should be easier to adopt. That you shouldn't have to be rich, famous or an ambassador to be able to go adopt kids from other countries so easy.

Think about it. Everyone lives longer. If we all have just one child that doubles the population in your life time. If you live to be 80 or so your kids will probably have kids and that it now 3 times. Your all still here, taking up space...using things up....I think it is selfish to have even one, but I did it.

Here is how I see it. My man and his wife had one. That one now has 2. I had 2. So from 3 people we now have 5. Its getting kinda bad. My kids will probably have kids...and so on....and that leads to road rage. Heh. All those frickin people crammed in one city.

[kellygrrrrrl]

I jook at just my 1 side of the family.

2 grandparents, 7 children, who had between all of them....14 more and now between them, is another 3 so far...thats 26 people! in just a span of maybe 30-40-50 years, and just 2 people started all that! Sheesh thats a lot of folks.

Hey man, the buck stops here......

And man, the pressure! Let me tell you. Everybody wants us to have babies. When are we getting some grandbabies? When will "Niece" have a cousin to play with? When When When? HUH HUH HUH?

You should have seen the look of dissapointment when my I told my Grandma how I felt, and how I was considering NOT having kids. After I said my peace, she actually said that that was very un-selfish of me, and how she understood and respected that. THAT alone was rewarding, as it causes serious physical pain to my grandmother to admit anything or give a compliment.... :confused

[Fierce Critter]

I agree with both Kelly & Dark 100%.

Population control/having kids is actually two subjects for me.

In regard to population control - Jon and I believe in a need for it. However, we admit to being clueless as to a good solution for it. We both think what goes in in countries like China is horrific.

In regard to children - I've stated mine & my husband's stance on this before, so I'll spare the long version. We chose NOT to have children. A couple years into our marriage, "we" got a vasectomy. We choose NOT to inflict what we realize is a pretty self-absorbed lifestyle on children. We don't like children. We don't need them. We don't give a rat's ass about passing on the "family name" and all that egotistical bullshit.

But we also do fear the future. And wouldn't want to put a child through what we believe is happening to this world.

There are many, many more reasons. But basically, Kelly & Dark expressed much of it.

[Shade Everdark]

What, specifically, are you referring to, FC, in regards to what goes on in China?

[kellygrrrrrl]

Don't they kill baby girls? I think you are only allowed one daughter or something to that effect.....is that right?

[Shade Everdark]

Most of that, though, is not state-sanctioned. That comes from millenia of Chinese culture. Boys are viewed as more valuable, so often, if the family has a girl, they kill it or allow it to die in favor of trying again for a boy. It also happened much more often in the rural areas where old cultural values still held strong, than it did in the major population centers.

Not pretty, but not state-sanctioned. Offiicial state policy has been to reward those who stopped at one child, and to punish through fiscal penalties and psychological pressure, usually from leaders of family planning teams.

[Guest Megalicious]

Don't they kill baby girls? I think you are only allowed one daughter or something to that effect.....is that right?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I dont know about china but they do it in India ... I heard something about it on NPR the other night and ended up crying myself to sleep ... =( It becaue I bit more of an emotional thing when you are pregnant.

Kelly I use to think the same as you, in some ways I still do. I never thought I ever wanted kids, I didnt want them to grow up in the horrible world that I had, ect. ect. But when you feel you baby move for the first time, or you get to hear its heartbeat .. or see its little face in an ultrasound all of that melts away.. and you think to yourself ..How could I have never wanted a child? lol .....

I agree with Dark, its a lack of knowing there are consequences to you actions. Children are getting rasied by TV and PC's becasue people are no longer being Parents, and exposer to sex, drugs, porn ect is all due to bad parenting. Im sorry but I refuse to let my child become a spoiled brat that wont listen to me, I may be strict and harsh, but My child will know what consequences are.... and when he is older he will thank me. =)

[Rayne]

I, on the other hand, am 26 ... with four kids.

I am divorced from one child's father, and in the process of divorcing the father of my other three. Only one was planned. The other three were pleasant surprises concived on different forms of birth control -- which is why I opted for the tubal ligation offered to me by my OB/GYN when I ended up with an emergency c-section with my fourth.

One of my children has severe psychological issues. You'd rarely know it talking to her, expecially if she is on her medication. I do not "drug" my child up because I can't deal with her. I can. She has problems dealing with her self without her medication. She gets so entirely frustrated with herself that she can not control her actions that she can't focus on anything.

One of my children is Autistic. You meet him, you know something is different with him, but you can't quite put your finger on it. He's classified as Asperger's Syndrome. A mild form of Autistim, which most likely will allow him to succeed in regular school, probably with some help.

One of my children has a rare digestive disorder. She misses a lot of school and has been hospitalized. No one knows how to treat it, cure it or keep it from happening.

Two of my children have asthma. They get it from me. So severe at times, we have inhalors and nebulizers all over the place.

I wouldn't trade my children for the world. I feel blessed to be their mom.

[kellygrrrrrl]

Don't get me wrong.

I want a child. I do. I want to expirience pregnancy. I want to go through the excitement of seeing the ultrasounds, and movement etc.....

I very much adore children. Truley I do. I want very much to have a child.

But seeing things from other peoples perspectives has terrified me of kids.

Seeing other kids and how they treat eachother, it's the OTHER kids I'm worried about.

The kids that do have bad parents and are bad kids and are influences on our kids....I know it's always been bad, but it just seems so much more intensified over the years.

I ask myself this question. Will the world be a better place without another "Franks/Kwiatkowski"? the answer is Probably.

I like to drink. I like to smoke schmot. I like to expiriement with other things. I have ALWAYS been a partyer.....(Something I recently noticed about myself) always on the go go. I have to have my time with my girls, I am not financially stable. My husband, likes to frivilously spend money, we both agree we are too selfish for kids ....right now anyway. If we do do it by age 30...I don't want to.

My husband has even said to me, You are to impatient for children. I know that. I know I have a short fuse. I am my mother.....and that scares me. I'm going on 27 real quick. There is a lot of time and room for my mind to change. It usually does.

Having a family is an attractive thing to desire. But I see the consequences as well. the whole picture.

It's a split feeling.

Rayne sweetie.....I apologize if I said anything to offend. I just try to generalize my thoughts....there is a spectrum of exceptions for anything I ever say. I'm not trying to use any one example as my thought, just trying to get the whole picture across as a whole....

if that makes any sense....

[kellygrrrrrl]

I dont know about china but they do it in India ... I heard something about it on NPR the other night and ended up crying myself to sleep ... =( It becaue I bit more of an emotional thing when you are pregnant.

Kelly I use to think the same as you, in some ways I still do. I never thought I ever wanted kids, I didnt want them to grow up in the horrible world that I had, ect. ect. But when you feel you baby move for the first time, or you get to hear its heartbeat ..  or see its little face in an ultrasound all of that melts away.. and you think to yourself ..How could I have never wanted a child? lol .....

I agree with Dark, its a lack of knowing there are consequences to you actions.  Children are getting rasied by TV and PC's becasue people are no longer being Parents, and exposer to sex, drugs, porn ect is all due to bad parenting. Im sorry but I refuse to let my child become a spoiled brat that wont listen to me, I may be strict and harsh, but My child will know what consequences are....  and when  he is older he will thank me. =)

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

So its a HE???? :woot:

[Guest Megalicious]

So its a HE???? :woot:

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yes lol ... silly...

[Rayne]

Rayne sweetie.....I apologize if I said anything to offend.  I just try to generalize my thoughts....there is a spectrum of exceptions for anything I ever say.  I'm not trying to use any one example as my thought, just trying to get the whole picture across as a whole....

if that makes any sense....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

No problem at all Kelly.

[Blackmail]

Most of that, though, is not state-sanctioned.  That comes from millenia of Chinese culture.  Boys are viewed as more valuable, so often, if the family has a girl, they kill it or allow it to die in favor of trying again for a boy.  It also happened much more often in the rural areas where old cultural values still held strong, than it did in the major population centers.

Not pretty, but not state-sanctioned.  Offiicial state policy has been to reward those who stopped at one child, and to punish through fiscal penalties and psychological pressure, usually from leaders of family planning teams.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You are correct that it isn't state sanctioned, however, Lisa Ling - she's the Chinese woman on the show "the view" says that Law enforcement has killed children or taken them from parents and sold them. She is a Chinese rights advocate. She also says that this doesn't happen as often now as it did 20 years ago but she claims it still does happen.

[Head Wreck]

china: one child per couple:

india: daughters are a financial burden due to dowrys, its illegal for a doctor to tell the pearents the childs sex due to risk of abortion based on sex, but there are no limits.

just loss of land and expensive dowrys.

[Scary Guy]

In a word, yes

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070723/?fr=c2...fc=1;ft=18;fm=1

Two birds with one stone infact, say bye bye to world hunger :D

[Shade Everdark]

You are correct that it isn't state sanctioned, however, Lisa Ling - she's the Chinese woman on the show "the view" says that Law enforcement has killed children or taken them from parents and sold them.    She is a Chinese rights advocate.  She also says that this doesn't happen as often now as it did 20 years ago but she claims it still does happen.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Police--they're brutalizers the world over.

[Hellion]

I couldn't agree more Dark.

I git spanked with the wooded spoon, the belt, backhanded across the face, I even had to "fetch my own switch" a few times.....

Guess what....I never did those things again!

You don't have to tell me twice.

I also have no lingering ill effects from that either.  I wasn't abused in that fashion.  Nor do I consider what my parents did to be abuse.  I am greatful for it...I think I am a decent human being.

It makes me thing that swatting your kid in the face for swearing at thier elders is "Abuse" ...NO....you respect your elders- lesson #1.  SMACK* bar of soap.

No, you cannot discipline your child in a physical manner without being threatened to have them taken away.

If you don't have a handle on your kids by age 5 when they start going to school, you've got trouble on hand. 

The most valuable of lessons should be taught before age 5. 

If you smack your kid, they tell, you get them taken away.  How sad is that.

-again- another thin line. 

What is disciplinary action?  What is abuse?

Leaving a mark is abuse.  Calling names is abuse.  Certain words are abuse. 

Your thoughts?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

:devil Yeah until legislation got put into the family,hey I got punished for doing bad stuff and I learned

[Fierce Critter]

What, specifically, are you referring to, FC, in regards to what goes on in China?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I don't like restrictions on how many children someone can have. Just because I don't like nor want them myself doesn't mean I don't believe someone else shouldn't have the freedom to make their own choice as to how many they will have.

It's a quandry - I believe the world is being overpopulated. But I don't like freedoms being restricted to deal with it. I don't pretend to have even a trace of a solution.

And I'm also referring to the dumping off of infant girls who end up in filthy, badly run orphanages. It may not be state-sanctioned, but it's horrific nonetheless. Again, just 'cause I don't like children nor want them doesn't mean I wish them ill-will. I've seen documentaries on these orphanages and it pained me. Little baby girls strapped onto wooden potty chairs in lieu of clean diapers, illness, etc. It's deplorable.

I don't know the answers. But I don't like the "solutions" some are coming up with.

[The_Dark]

Over-Population will sort itself out. Always does, always will... starvation and desease are the normal methods. Mother nature is a bitch.

[torn asunder]

yeah - ever done a fruit-fly-type experiment in school!? population boomboomboom, and then - wham! all dead within a day or so. yep, mother nature is a bitch, but she knows her shit...

[cptdeath]

some popular forms of population control are H.I.V. ,ciggerets, and cancer.

ever see those truth adds. i bet those adds sell alot of ciggerets.

the first time they showed the death toll i thought to my self wow what an effective way to control population. add all those deaths and multiply for how many kids they would have since we have been smoking and figure out what are population would be without somking.

thank you cigerets for making a better life for my childrens children

i often suspect that the health care industry limits access to knowledge of cures for things like aids and cancer. I 've heard rumors about cancer being treated over seas with o3 treatmeants. i read an article about some guy with aids who went into a jungle in peru and walked out cured 8 months later.

[Goth Brooks]

There are currently 6.5 BILLION people on this planet.

And that is with all the war, poverty, pestilence, diseases, etc that we have going on.

If moron hippy lovey dovey shitheads had their way, this place would be bursting at the seams and there would not be enough food to go around.

I'm all for population control in many forms.

Poor people should be sterilized after x amount of kids, if they lose one let them adopt.

People with ridiculously low IQs should be sterilized.

People with extremely high IQs should be governmentally funded to produce more children.

ANYONE found positive for HIV should be sterilized.

Sex offenders of a certain degree should be sterilized.

More crimes should carry the death penalty, which should be used in all 50 states.

The border with Mexico should be walled and guarded by the active Army and Marines, any and all illegals of any nationality should be sterilized (no matter their age) and returned to their country of origin.

And cptdeath, AIDS cannot be cured... we have absolutely no cures for virii, not even the common cold.