What's The Point Of Marriage Anyway?

[Homicidalheathen]

The purpose of marriage....is too drive us all nuts.....make us hate the opposite sex.....and never want to hear a screaming brat again.

To make us spend more money, clean more messes....work more hours...that you don't get paid for.....than you would ever have to do if you were single.

It is to make us hate romance, become sexless worker drones who just procreate so someone can profit off of our diaper and formula buying.

OH yah, I am in a good mood today....can't ya tell?

Oh and don't forget.....its so you can give up most of your rights because someone else isn't comfortable with your attitude or needs......

so you can share a always dirty bathroom with someone who leaves the seat up......or a kid that wont get out.....

[Vater Araignee]

I didn't read every post, but I'll go out and say "It is a legal contract of sexual exclusivity between two individual of opposite sex that contain tax and other monetary benefits."

Legally that is all that it is.

[HipsterDufus]

I'll just throw in my two cents here. I believe that rites and ceremonies are very important to myself and to society as a whole. Actually, I think that the fact that there are no coming of age ceremonies in our culture (based on maturity, not on age) is very disappointing and leads to problems, but that's another thread. Marriage, on the other hand is a ceremony that, in my case, had little to do with God, but everything to do with declaring a commitment in front of friends, family, and nature (we were married outside). It meant (to me) that I had found someone that I thought was special enough to make a commitment to in front of these very important people. It also meant that I expected them to hold me accountable to be a good husband. Marriage is an acceptance of commitment and if you don't feel that you don't want to be committed to someone, then don't get married.

[phee]

I'll just throw in my two cents here. I believe that rites and ceremonies are very important to myself and to society as a whole. Actually, I think that the fact that there are no coming of age ceremonies in our culture (based on maturity, not on age) is very disappointing and leads to problems, but that's another thread. Marriage, on the other hand is a ceremony that, in my case, had little to do with God, but everything to do with declaring a commitment in front of friends, family, and nature (we were married outside). It meant (to me) that I had found someone that I thought was special enough to make a commitment to in front of these very important people. It also meant that I expected them to hold me accountable to be a good husband. Marriage is an acceptance of commitment and if you don't feel that you don't want to be committed to someone, then don't get married.

Very very well said my friend

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

Steven,

Lets just say we are both correct. Yes marrige was talked about inthe Bible.. even in the Old Testament.. but the Church played no part in the marrige ceremony. The Church did setup provisions for Divorce but for the reasen that to get a divorce you had to break an oath.

[kellygrrrrrl]

I'm pretty traditional when it comes to my views on marriage.

Simply put.

[phee]

I'm pretty traditional when it comes to my views on marriage.

Simply put.

Ok...

Traditional by who's tradition?

Catholic?

Protistant?

-Pentacostal

-Baptist

-Mormon

-Presbaterian

Hindi?

Celtic?

Can you be more specific? (there are a lot of traditions out there)

[Steven]

Steven,

Lets just say we are both correct. Yes marrige was talked about inthe Bible.. even in the Old Testament.. but the Church played no part in the marrige ceremony. The Church did setup provisions for Divorce but for the reasen that to get a divorce you had to break an oath.

exactly Bud.

this was a big deal, because the oath was a covenant oath that included God. There are also other scriptures where God is angry about the breaking of marriage covenants, warnigns against such things, etc. It was a part of the culture to place spiritual reverance in the marital arrangement - at least in terms of biblical accounts and the tribes of Israel. In any event - I'm simply making the point that there were definately spiritual connotations to the early marriage arrangement.

[kellygrrrrrl]

A Man & Woman join as one in holy matrimony before the public and before GOD.

Whatever god you choose.

Whatever Sect you choose.

[phee]

A Man & Woman join as one in holy matrimony before the public and before GOD.

Whatever god you choose.

Whatever Sect you choose.

Well that is some traditions I guess... but not all of them

[Steven]

Well that is some traditions I guess... but not all of them

I think we're all going to draw from our own conclusions and traditions however my fine Phee....therefore like Kellygirl I too am a traditionalist as applies to me in my world........

[phee]

That's cool, just wanted to make it clear, which traditions, the traditional meant

[BrassFusion]

A Man & Woman join as one in holy matrimony before the public and before GOD.

Whatever god you choose.

Whatever Sect you choose.

but not... whatever partner you choose?

[kellygrrrrrl]

I'm not taking this into where I think its going.

Not my place to make those judgements, definitions, rules, etc.....

Lets just keep it at "I'm traditional" in my beliefs.

[Steven]

I'm not taking this into where I think its going.

Not my place to make those judgements, definitions, rules, etc.....

Lets just keep it at "I'm traditional" in my beliefs.

smart girl.....(they'll pounce you know)

me, I'm pretty much a boy/girl thing only kinda guy NOW I STARTED IT

[BrassFusion]

*shrug* i'm with you guys, i only plan on marrying a guy, myself.

that's what works for me in MY life, anyway.

[torn asunder]

i think marriage should be gone, in the governmental sense... "civil unions", or whatever they're being called now, should be the only thing there is... makes it equal for everyone, both hetero- and homosexuals. you want a religious ceremony to proclaim your committment to one another!? i think that's great! keep it to religion, tho, and keep lawmakers and gov. officials & agencies out of it. personally, i have no qualms about committing myself to someone thru ceremony, if that's what we decide, but there's no way i'll ever get married - doesn't make any sense to me at this point. i do think something needs to be addressed regarding the legal side tho - beneficiaries, health insurance issues, etc., but i don't see why that couldn't be dealt with thru gov't civil unions...

[Msterbeau]

i think marriage should be gone, in the governmental sense... "civil unions", or whatever they're being called now, should be the only thing there is... makes it equal for everyone, both hetero- and homosexuals. you want a religious ceremony to proclaim your committment to one another!? i think that's great! keep it to religion, tho, and keep lawmakers and gov. officials & agencies out of it. personally, i have no qualms about committing myself to someone thru ceremony, if that's what we decide, but there's no way i'll ever get married - doesn't make any sense to me at this point. i do think something needs to be addressed regarding the legal side tho - beneficiaries, health insurance issues, etc., but i don't see why that couldn't be dealt with thru gov't civil unions...

Bing!!

[Steven]

i think marriage should be gone, in the governmental sense... "civil unions", or whatever they're being called now, should be the only thing there is... makes it equal for everyone, both hetero- and homosexuals. you want a religious ceremony to proclaim your committment to one another!? i think that's great! keep it to religion, tho, and keep lawmakers and gov. officials & agencies out of it. personally, i have no qualms about committing myself to someone thru ceremony, if that's what we decide, but there's no way i'll ever get married - doesn't make any sense to me at this point. i do think something needs to be addressed regarding the legal side tho - beneficiaries, health insurance issues, etc., but i don't see why that couldn't be dealt with thru gov't civil unions...

too watered down and safe and self protecting for me, the notion of civil unions.

I'm married.

I'm fucking good at it.

But I work VERY hard at it - and Laura trusts me (and vice versa) beyond description.

And yes there is risk involved, and no back door escape clause, and I like it this way.

[BrassFusion]

too watered down and safe and self protecting for me, the notion of civil unions.

I'm married.

I'm fucking good at it.

But I work VERY hard at it - and Laura trusts me (and vice versa) beyond description.

And yes there is risk involved, and no back door escape clause, and I like it this way.

he's not saying you wouldn't be "allowed" to be married in the eyes of your god and your community.

the civil union would cover the legal aspect, and a private ceremony that followed whatever rules you wanted it to would cover the spiritual aspect.

VERY good idea he has, actually. i was thinking about the whole thing last night while i was boiling water and came to almost an identical conclusion

edit:

And yes there is risk involved, and no back door escape clause, and I like it this way.

regardless how good a couple you are, you would be legally able to divorce if you wanted to. you definitely do have the option of "escape," just like everyone else

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

um... I swear to God... WTF?... Why is it a good idea when TA thinks of it but when I brought it up it was a crappy idea?

[Steven]

he's not saying you wouldn't be "allowed" to be married in the eyes of your god and your community.

the civil union would cover the legal aspect, and a private ceremony that followed whatever rules you wanted it to would cover the spiritual aspect.

VERY good idea he has, actually. i was thinking about the whole thing last night while i was boiling water and came to almost an identical conclusion

edit:

regardless how good a couple you are, you would be legally able to divorce if you wanted to. you definitely do have the option of "escape," just like everyone else

although its changing, "Marriage" seems to imply a greater degree of legal responsibility once the relationship has been severed.

In terms of escape, it's also just basically much harder emotionally and spiritually to walk away from your wife than it would be with your girlfriend or "S.O" Words like "Wife" and "Husband" communicate a much deeper degree of permancy and commitment, whether we agree with that or not. Much like "boyfriend" and "Fiancee" communciate different levels of identity.....one is potenitally temporal, while the other is indicitive of building and planning a future life togethor in a "traditional" sense.

I dont like the watering down of traditions simply because we no longer think in long term ideals.

I dont like the re-classification of traditions based on PC objectives.

And I dont like where your head goes when you boil water. Stop that.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

WTF... Why is this a good idea when TA thinks of it.. but when I have brought it up over the last.. oh.. 3 years.. it was a bad idea?

[Steven]

WTF... Why is this a good idea when TA thinks of it.. but when I have brought it up over the last.. oh.. 3 years.. it was a bad idea?

no no, still a bad idea. What are you boing water too now?

[BrassFusion]

although its changing, "Marriage" seems to imply a greater degree of legal responsibility once the relationship has been severed.

In terms of escape, it's also just basically much harder emotionally and spiritually to walk away from your wife than it would be with your girlfriend or "S.O" Words like "Wife" and "Husband" communicate a much deeper degree of permancy and commitment, whether we agree with that or not. Much like "boyfriend" and "Fiancee" communciate different levels of identity.....one is potenitally temporal, while the other is indicitive of building and planning a future life togethor in a "traditional" sense.

I dont like the watering down of traditions simply because we no longer think in long term ideals.

I dont like the re-classification of traditions based on PC objectives.

And I dont like where your head goes when you boil water. Stop that.

there's no law against me calling you my husband, regardless of the legal status of our relationship.

as for the "re-classification of traditions based on pc objectives," what you may be failing to remember is that our government is not the clearing-house of traditions. THEIR business is furnishing equal rights and protections to their citizens, which they're failing to do.

traditional marriage has only been an american tradition for 200 years

WTF... Why is this a good idea when TA thinks of it.. but when I have brought it up over the last.. oh.. 3 years.. it was a bad idea?

well, i think he had a good idea because i read it just now. i entertained similar notions while boiling water last night. i (personally) never heard your opinion on the matter.

i'm not surprised that you share it, however.