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Posted

Clean as a whistle

Posted

Doesn't whistle while he works

Posted

Is never ever clean

Posted

Isn't Mr Clean.

Posted

Dirty old man

Posted

woman of the year

Posted

Man in fear

Posted

she pees herslef if you scare her

Posted

Also might want warning that if I'm drunk, I snort when I laugh.

Posted

Is going to snort and pee herself.

Posted

Brushes horse teeth

Posted

Counts to ten using his hooves.

Posted (edited)

Cannot understand why a horseshoe is considered lucky.

Edited by Paper Hearts
Posted

Has a foot in the barn

Posted

Throws parties in the barn

Posted

throws horse shoes in order to defend herslef

Posted

Knows that those are the ONLY shoes I'll throw!

Posted

Likes skaters...

Posted (edited)

stays up all night killing flys

Edited by Paper Hearts
Posted

Screams "Heeeeeeeeeelp meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" in his sleep

Posted (edited)

Crys out in her sleep "all my feelings exposed"

Edited by Paper Hearts
Posted

Left me with no witty response.

Posted

Is out of her wits

Posted

Is out of his mind

Posted

IS PROBABLY IN HER UNDERWEAR

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    • et-novum

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    • et-novum
      I'm feeling like a squirrel playing in traffic that has, so far, avoided consequences from my own poor choices. 
    • Soulrev
      This is very true. My wife is a very outgoing, social, and overall happy person, and that's why I fell in love with her the moment we met. She took the initiative to approach me - and had it not been for that, I may have never met her! Over the 11 years we've been together, quite happily, I've learned that she makes it an effort to be happy and not let life get her down. Wherever we go she will light up a room. She's not always happy, but she always does her best to at least appear happy, and that, to me, just makes her that much more attractive. Not to mention, she's always getting hit on 🤣🤷🏻‍♂️ So, I think a lot of people find people with an outgoing, confident and positive attitude more attractive and more approachable! Idk that's just me, though. . . I still say you will find your special someone soon! Get out there, put on a happy face, and get 'em! 🤠👍
    • Scary Guy
      I went to Cold Waves II with a friend, and then we met a few other friends there.  It was a fantastic time.  I hope to make it again sometime.
    • Scary Guy
      WE . ARE . FUCKED! Start preppin'
    • Scary Guy
      For once I get to post it :( Was in the hospital for my first (and hopefully last) kidney stone.  Had some opiates to help with that pain, and now I'm amazingly impacted / constipated (which I went back to the ER for.)  Trying not to hit that level of pain again.  I'll still take it over the little ball of razorblades stone (and it was only 2mm!.) Getting old sucks.  Worst birthday present ever.
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